Page 47 - HaMizrachi Australia Rosh HaShana Yom Kippur 5781

RELATIONSHIPS GENERAL INTEREST

Sherrie Miller-Heineman

Proper Preparation

Prevents Poor Performance

Woman, for there to be an encoun-
ter, a meaningful dialogue through
which each gender collectively and
individually is afforded the unique
opportunity of knowing and under-
standing ourselves first and then our
other half. This holy encounter leads
to a total integration and perfection of
male and female traits and heals the
original fragmentation of the universe
while re-uniting us with our Maker.

The letters of ׁשאר, when rearranged,
ֹ
spell ר ֵ ׁשא, happiness. Happiness is a
ֹ
product of a job well done. Happiness
osh means beginning and shana changed, what traits need to be elim- is a sense of satisfaction that the yeo-
means year. We are celebrating inated and which new attributes need man’s effort we made has borne fruit
Rthe beginning of a new year. to be incorporated to reach more ele- and enables us to live a much more
What is the significance of these two vated goals in the coming year. Our meaningful life.
words and the message they impart? Rabbis tell us it is easier to learn the
entirety of Mishna than to change The first word of the first parasha in
Shana refers to the dimension of one character trait. However, they the Torah is Bereishit, which is com-
time and stems from the same root as console us with the adage: א ָ ר ֲ ע ַ צ םּופ ְ ל prised of two words – ׁשאר (begin-
ֹ
shinui, change. We must change with א ָ ר ְ ג ַ א – “according to the effort, is the ning) and תִי ַּ ב (home). The implicit
time or we will stagnate and die. We reward!” message is that the preliminary
must choose to move forward or inev- and primary purpose of Creation is
itably we will find ourselves moving Marriage is the pivotal arena for inter- achieved through the home. G-d’s
backward. Nothing can thrive in a facing the lower self with the Divine expectation of us is to make Him a
vacuum. We must be adamant in our self, by requiring us to see our reflec- home on earth in which His glory will
resolve to better ourselves and make tion – the good and the bad – through be revealed and appreciated. This can
the necessary adjustments in our- our partner. We are sometimes faced be achieved by consciously striving
selves before we can hope to attain a with many unpleasant revelations to create an ideal relationship in the
fulfilling and satisfying relationship about ourselves and must choose if coming New Year and preparing to
with someone else. we wish to play the blame game and build and strengthen our marriages. If
project the flaw onto our partner, we can do that, we will discover ulti-
The beginning of a new year is a rendering ourselves unchanged and
time of reflection, a time to stop and smug, or accept responsibility, seek mate fulfillment and satisfaction in
our lives.
introspect and assess what we have the path of self-refinement and move
accomplished in the past year in order toward our true essence of G-dliness. Blessings for a joyous and meaningful
to determine and choose our desti- New Year!
nation and goals for the coming year. One cannot do this work alone. In
Rosh Hashanah is a time to ask our- Bereishit we are told, “it is not good
selves how well we have succeeded for Man to be alone.” It is precisely Sherrie Miller-Heineman has an M.A.
in achieving our goals of last year, for this reason G-d split the all-en- in marriage counseling with 30 years
what still needs to be improved and compassing Man into a Man and a experience.

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