Page 4 - Microsoft Word - Jenni.docx

been hurt a lot so please know that this is an area where her protectors will surface more easily. Makes sense right? In our relationship, her protectors came up when I
tried to hold her responsible for some of my wounds. I also didn’t understand that in my attempt to make my environment safer, that I put her charm and dynamic personality under a microscope. DON’T DO THIS. If you want Jenni to feel loved, you will rejoice in her charisma. And yes, people are going to hit on her everywhere she goes and she is going to get a lot of attention. She is sparkly and magnetic. When creating boundaries, just remember that any guideline request should include reflective questions such as: Will Jenni shine? Will Jenni feel seen? Will Jenni feel trusted? This will go a long way in helping her feel freedom. Which brings me to trust...
Trust:
I lost Jenni’s trust in our relationship. I struggle to write about this because the loss has been great. I thought she and I would marry someday. Call me a romantic but when I think about Jenni and what she wants in this life and how she wants to invest her time, I feel alignment with her. I want to build a community with her, buy a house together, travel to Paris, ride boats.JI now have to live with questions around how my own actions led to me losing her confidence in me. Because I don’t want you to make the mistakes I have made, please read this next part carefully.
Trust is created by consistently showing up for someone and by doing what you say you will do. Trust is demonstrating to someone that you will do your best to protect their wounds. Trust is faith. It is about believing in the other person’s goodness, integrity, and longing to give and experience love as much as you do. I lost Jenni’s trust through a series of mistakes. If I could do it differently now, I would have worked hard to demonstrate my faith in her from the start.
My struggle to believe anyone would want to love me fully, created a huge barrier between us. Based on my belief that I am not lovable, my fears impacted all aspects of my relationship with Jenni. I mean, if you look hard enough, you can always find a way to prove your worst fears. My advice to you: Jenni is trustworthy. Do not question her every move and intention. Tell her and show her in a million different ways that