Page 321 - Under the Cover of Darkness

4 November 2014 —
Well I just look misery right in the eye and say "Stop
following me all the time or I’m taking out a restraining
order!"

5 November 2014 —
TODAY: I am going to a "wig fitting" set up by the NHS
due to me having hair loss from chemotherapy. Mom’s
coming with me. This could be "interesting".

5 November 2014 —
Soooo the wig fitting was an experience. I turned up as
usual with my Americanised expectations which were met
in true Bromsgrove, NHS, and Coupon bijou style with a
"can’t do" attitude. They asked me what my own hair was
like. "Thigh length, thick jet black, with a widow’s peak"
"Well we can’t do anywhere near that long and we can’t do
jet black only "expresso" (there is no such word expresso)
and we can’t do a widow’s peak and it has to be synthetic
hair not real....."
Then they proceeded to jam several ludicrously over
voluminous numbers onto my head which pretty much
totally obscured my face - (don’t know what they were
trying to say there) in the end I snapped....
Right, how much do the NHS pay and how much would it
take me to get a proper, real hair, colour matched, cut to
fit bespoke piece? £500!
So it’s not that you CAN’T do it - it’s just you’ve been told
not to tell me about it and only offer me the synthetic
ones?
In the end I chose the least hideous synthetic NHS wig
(which I am genuinely grateful to have been afforded)