Page 7 - Gary's Book - Final Copy 7.9.2017_Active

Also, I learned that I could not give away what I did not have – such things as
kindness, peace, joy and especially love. I always found it difficult to justify
resentments in relationships. A friend once told me, “Never die with the music in
you.” I will not die with the music in me. I will tell my story; I will sing my song.

Knowing that the silence within me kept me going daily, I accepted Christ as my
Savior at an early age. Call it Soul, Conscious, God or whatever, I had to embrace

my current world, learn from it, grow because of it, toss it aside, and then create
my today and move into my tomorrow. I knew that I could not solve a problem
with the same mind that had created it. I have made choices in my life that were
wrong. I have learned from them, changed my mind and then redirected myself.
For me, this has been by treasuring and being connected to God. My earthly dad

was not there for me or any of us children. He was always at work, asleep, or
somewhere else. When he was there, he was still absent from our lives. I never
really had a dad in the sense of the word “dad,” but I have always had a Father in
Heaven.

Wisdom is avoiding any thoughts that weaken you. You usually get what you

expect.

A driving force was that I did not want my past to be my future. I grew by taking
risks. My most difficult risk was being honest to myself and to others. My faith and
my religion helped me tremendously. To be honest and authentic when times are
bad requires courage and humility. I had to face fears of exposure, rejection and
hurt, which were all major risks that I had to take to grow emotionally. The tough

test was being humble.

Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but it is thinking of yourself less.

Pope John XXIII said, “Do not walk through life or time without leaving worthy
evidence of your passage.” I have attempted to fulfill that goal in my life with my
family, my friends and my co-workers.

I learned that life is a struggle and is very difficult when you are fully dependent

on yourself with no guidance from any role models. I figured that the way you
thought determined the way you felt, and the way you felt influenced the way you
acted. I knew I MUST change the way I thought.

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