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484 | A New Light
this evil inclination that appears like a good inclination,
clothing itself in mitzvot. Help me know that only by
means of faith and teshuvah are we redeemed from the
suffering of tiredness. Give me the strength to accept the
suffering of tiredness with love, and to thank You.
Grant me the complete faith that only You give life,
and that You can give me strength and life and renew my
energy even if I sleep very little. The main thing is that I
sleep without any craving and desire to sleep whatsoever.
Master of the universe, completely nullify my craving for
sleep. Completely nullify my evil inclination for sleep.
Rescue me! Completely nullify my craving to sleep away
my life. Completely nullify my craving to burn up the
hours of my life. Could this death give me life? Rescue
me from sleep, which attempts to seize me.
Master of the universe, help me serve You even when
I feel that I am being overwhelmed by weariness. Give
me the knowledge that I should not sit down for even a
single minute, because the essence of the evil inclination
at night is the drive to cause a person to sit down. If
he does, it can easily make him feel tired and sorry
for himself, thinking that he must have compassion on
himself and desire to sleep, or it can make him taste the
counterfeit sweetness of sleep. In that way, it easily drags
him into an evil sleep. He does not realize that this is a
dangerous ambush of the evil inclination that wants to
seize him, and is only waiting for him to sit down so that
it may immediately grab him.
Please, King Who redeems and rescues, Who redeems
and protects, have compassion on me so that I will be
clearly aware that the war is arduous and I will not let
that break me, but I will stand firm and battle my evil
inclination. This is the war of our lives, the “war of
Chapter Nine: | 493 17
know, with complete and strong awareness, without any
doubt, that all tiredness is only a form of suffering, and
that what Hashem wants of me when I wake up tired is to
accept that suffering with love, to stand up and express
my thanks for this suffering of exhaustion. In that way,
may I renew my complete faith until You will restore
my soul and mind, and I will no longer be tired, because
only faith nullifies tiredness and gives a person strength
and life.
Help me so that my first thought on getting up in the
morning will be the awareness of the world-to-come.
May I cling anew to the world-to-come, say Modeh ani
joyfully, wash my hands next to my bed, and make all
of my preparations with great alacrity. Help me so that
after I have gotten up, I do not sit down, so that my
evil inclination will not seize me and make me tired and
then fill me with the desire to sleep. Instead, may I do
everything standing up. And help me so that while I am
organizing myself and I cannot say words of Torah, I will
think of You and thank You for everything without end:
“Thank You for my having slept, thank You that I got
up, thank You for my clothes and shoes, for my blanket,
for my watch and for the water, for the washing cup and
for my health,” and so on.
Master of the universe, You created Your world in
Your beneficent will in accordance with what arose in
Your primordial thought. You created heaven and all of
its host, the earth and all that is on it. You created man
upon it, and You blew the breath of life into His nostrils
so that he may recognize Your greatness and splendor.
You give life to all beings, because You are the Soul
of all souls and the Life of all lives. Hashem my God, I
deposit my nefesh, ruach and neshamah in Your pure
and faithful hand. Hashem my God, purify them from