Page 16 - SAFFER Magazine 01

A Close-Up of Winter’s Face

’m waiting for a bus to a neighbouring town, where I attend language studies.
IMy eyelashes are frozen. At first, I try not blink as I’m afraid the upper and low-
er lashes will stick together, if they touch. I can feel contact lenses already dry in
my eyes. So, I resort to facial exercises just to make sure I don’t turn into a statue.

It’s my first winter in Europe. Temperature, on this particular day, is comfortable
at -26 degrees Celsius. The countryside landscape is as vivid and enchanting as a
scene in The Polar Express. But I can’t fully take it all in, because I’m highly irrita-
ble. The bus is late, again.

As a child growing up under the scotching African sun, I often dreamt of fairy tale
places with snow and white Christmases I read about from the books. But now
that I’m here, I start to question the motives of this life adventure. Because I didn’t
only leave a little piece of me behind but everything I know and familiar. Love, of course, is the answer. What
else could it be!

We eventually buy a car. But I’m at extremes, I either drive like a grandma or a formula one driver. Because I
simply can’t get the hang of driving on icy and slippery roads, and with road signs sometimes buried under
the heavy snow.

In retrospect, I realise that I’ve never fully known winter until I moved continents. And to fully witness winter
is not only a privilege but a gift, for an outdoor enthusiast. But I had to relearn how to drive. I had to relearn
how to live. Because I was no longer chasing my dreams, they were staring right at me as if in disbelief.

Category: Creative Nonfiction
Tags: Finnish winter, joys and challenges, life of an immigrant

Author Portrait & Short Bio: Born and bred in South Africa, Khaya Ronkainen nowadays calls Finland her
home, and it’s where she lives with her husband. Her overlapping experiences and life (city, rural, Africa, Europe)
largely influence her writing.

Feature Image (Winter landscape; a frozen river behind our countryside home)

| 16