Page 109 - EAP Manual

Interpersonal Effectiveness DEARMAN Cont.
MAN=the process; how I do it
be Mindful
 Keep focused on the goal
 Ignore threats, distractions, or attempts to change the subject
 Use the Broken Record technique—repeat what it is I want or say no over & over &
over
 Take a Timeout—if entering Feeling Mind or if the other person is in Feeling Mind &
return to the conversation later
Why? To keep my eye on the prize or end-game
Act confident
 Make eye contact; don’t look down
 Speak up & clearly; don’t mumble
 Stand/sit up straight; don’t slouch
 Think encouraging thoughts before & during
Why? Shows that I’m serious
Negotiate
 Compromise
 Discuss other options
 Turn the Tables by asking the other person:
o What do you think we can do?
o How do you think we can solve this problem?
Why? Be willing to give in a little at times in order to get what I need or want
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