Page 2 - Edwards AFB Desert Wings 10-30-15

Desert Wings Commentary
2 www.aerotechnews.com/edwardsafb
Coping with post traumatic stress disorder
by Shannon Collins
Arlington, Va.
As a disabled Air Force veteran living with post-trau-
matic stress from military sexual trauma, I’ve had my good
days and bad days but all of my hard work over the past two
years paid off when I recently achieved one of my goals
²FRPSOHWLQJP\¿UVWIXOOPDUDWKRQWKH0DULQH&RUSV
Marathon.
,KDGDGLI¿FXOWFKLOGKRRG0\IDWKHUFRPPLWWHGVXLFLGH they open, and there is so much crowd support and people
when I was five years old, and my mother struggled to
raise three children on her own. Right before I joined the
Air Force, I was sexually assaulted. I joined the Air Force
to serve my country, because my father had served in the
Air Force and because I’ve had family in all of the services
throughout the years. We’ve served since the Revolution-
ary War.
Five years ago, I was sexually assaulted for the second
time while I was serving overseas. I became very depressed
and gained about 50 pounds. I had been enlisted and then an
RI¿FHULQSXEOLFDIIDLUV0\IULHQGVDQGFRZRUNHUVQRWLFHG left the Air Force, I’ve lost 40 pounds and have gone from a
that I became withdrawn and less social but I wouldn’t tell
them what happened. It affected my work performance,
DQG,¿QDOO\ZHQWWRPHQWDOKHDOWKDERXWD\HDUODWHUIRU you can run it solo, whatever you’re more comfortable with.
depression and anxiety.
I was seeking help when I was hit with the drawdown
after 14 years in the service. My career was everything to
me, so this hit me hard. I hit bottom and almost checked
myself into an inpatient hospital for mental health for my
GHSUHVVLRQEHFDXVHRIVXLFLGDOWKRXJKWV,¿QDOO\DGPLWWHG
ZKDWKDSSHQHGWRPHDQGZHQWWRWKH$LU)RUFH2I¿FHRI I didn’t want to turn to alcohol or
Special Investigations to report the assault.
I went home for six months and went back to school
but I missed what I know and love, public affairs, writ-
ing about service members, and how important they are to
the military. Luckily, I found a government job at Defense
Media Activity.
Addiction runs in my family, so I didn’t want to turn to
alcohol or drugs to deal with my post-traumatic stress dis-
order. My father had turned to both before he died. Instead,
I found a new passion — running.
October 30, 2015
facebook.com/EdwardsDesertWings
While I had been on activity duty, the doctors had told me are visible” hat, running shoes and pants, and running belt
I couldn’t run anymore because I have osteoarthritis in both with my bib attached and took the metro in to the Pentagon
knees, and I have to get injections of fake cartilage every for the start line. I was nervous and excited. The crowds
six months. I had run track in junior high school, mainly are the hardest part for me, but I just told myself, “Just
sprinting, and had only run in the military for my physical breathe.” I just remind myself why I’m there and just try to
training tests. But when I started running, I found peace, focus on something else and try to calm down.
MR\DQGVWDUWHG¿QGLQJP\FRQ¿GHQFHDJDLQ
The security was crazy, but I got to my corral just in time.
,UDQP\¿UVWKDOIPDUDWKRQODVW1RYHPEHUDW'LVQH\ODQG I started out a little fast but kept up about an 11-minute
and was hooked. You get to run through the parks before pace until mile 16 or so. My main goal was to “Beat the
%ULGJH´EXW,UHDOO\ZDQWHGWR¿QLVKEHORZ¿YHKRXUV$W
cheering you on. After the race, I found some Disney run- mile 12, I was overcome with emotion because it’s the mile
ning groups on Facebook and have met up with them at of remembrance. You see rows of photos of the fallen. I saw
other Disney races. one runner getting very emotional over someone who meant
a great deal to him.
I’ve also been more active with the Wounded Warrior
Project, and during my long run training, I imagine some of It took a moment for me to get myself back together but
my WWP alumni and some of the people I’ve served with I pushed on. After that mile, I put my headphones back on
who are no longer with us running alongside me, motivating and focused. At mile 20, the bridge was a challenge, and at
me when I’m hitting that wall. mile 21, the sprain I had in my right ankle a few weeks ago
came back with a vengeance.
Since I began running in earnest three years ago when I
7KHVSUDLQKDGÀDUHGXSP\WHQGLQLWLVDQGP\ULJKWDQNOH
16-minute mile to a 10:30-mile pace. The running commu- was hurting a little before I had even started so I knew it
nity is very supportive and always there if you need them or would be an issue but I was able to ignore it most of the run
but by mile 21, it hurt so bad I couldn’t run on it anymore so
I had to walk most of the rest of the way from mile 21 to 26.
The night before the marathon, I had trouble sleeping,
and I had a few nightmares about my attack. When I woke Throughout the course, I saw signs like “determined,”
up, I threw on my WWP shirt, my “PTSD, not all wounds “remember your training” and “freedom isn’t free, thank
you for your service.” Many people had photos honoring
Addiction runs in my family, so service men and women who had fallen. It was very inspi-
rational. I used this energy to push me forward most of my
UXQ,¿QLVKHGLQDQGHDUQHGP\PHGDOIURPWKH
Marine graduate at the Iwo Jima Memorial.
drugs to deal with my post-traumatic
This journey from hitting bottom, crying all the time,
stress disorder. My father had turned gaining weight, losing myself because of what happened
with how I handled the assault and losing my job to now,
to both before he died. Instead, I having a good job, earning medals for running half mara-
thons and now a marathon has been interesting.
found a new passion — running.
I encourage everyone to venture out there and follow
your dreams. Go out and run or walk a 5K, then a 10K. The
running community is very supportive. You never know
where your feet will take you.
Commander’s
Action Line
HPDLOVSHDNFF#HGZDUGVDIPLO
The Commander’s Action Line gives all Airmen, re-
tirees, families and community members a direct link to
Brig. Gen. Carl Schaefer, 412th Test Wing commander.
The Action Line can be used to express constructive
points of view on the policies and procedures of the
base; discuss safety and security issues; and address
problems, concerns, or suggestions after traditional
methods have been exhausted.
The Commander’s Action Line should not be the
¿UVWDFWLRQWDNHQWRUHVROYHDQLVVXH7KRVHVHHNLQJ
DUHPHG\WRDSUREOHPVKRXOG¿UVWIROORZWKHFKDLQ
RIFRPPDQGDQGWDNHXSWKHPDWWHUZLWKWKHRI¿FHRI
SULPDU\UHVSRQVLELOLW\VXSHUYLVRUV¿UVWVHUJHDQWVRU
commanders.
Action Line queries may be submitted by sending an
e-mail to speak2cc@edwards.af.mil with Commander’s
Action Line as the subject heading or by calling (661)
277-7325. Action Line submissions must be written in
a courteous and professional tone, and must include a
name, an e-mail address or an alternative method of
contact. The requestor’s contact information will not be
published in compliance with Privacy Act restrictions.
Any messages received without contact information will
not be routed, so please be sure to provide some method
for communication.