Page 4 - 200812 - The 'X' Chronicles Newspaper - December 2008

4 The Top 100 Weird Stories of 2008 4 The Top 100 Weird Stories of 2008 The Top 100 Weird and baffling, neuroscientists believe it's legit. ALIEN LAUGHS The Top 100 Weird ALIEN LAUGHS Stories of 2008 77. End of School Term, Let's Have an Stories of 2008 Continued from Page 3 Orgy! Continued from Page 3 A British newspaper reported that an end-of- 83. Did Adolf Hitler Draw Disney the-school-term party in the town of Cumbria literally turned into an orgy, with almost 200 Characters? students "having unprotected sex in a village A Norwegian museum director claims to have square." We tend to be a bit skeptical of these discovered pictures of Disney cartoons drawn stories -- especially when they come from the by Adolf Hitler during World War II. Hitler was sensationalist British tabloid press -- but is there “Any species who a trained artist and a known fan of Disney films. a more awesome combination of words than has done so much This dichotomy between childhood innocence "having unprotected sex in a village square"? damage to a plant is and perhaps the worst person who ever lived is anything but sure to fetch a small fortune when the prints go 76. Facebook Water Fight Turns intelligent!” to auction. A teenage girl participating in a water fight promoted on Facebook was slammed to the 82. Court Finds Model Innocent Based ground by a burly young man she had angered on Breast Size by squirting red juice on his white T-shirt. Serena Kozakura, a buxom Japanese bikini Bringing juice to a water fight is certainly a model, was charged and initially found guilty of huge faux pas, but it still doesn't come close the breaking into a man's apartment by kicking a abomination that is girl-punching. So what hole in the door and crawling through. But, on happens next? " appeal, her lawyer had a Johnny Cochrane/Jackie Childs-like revelation and was 75. Size-16 Beauty Queen able to convince a judge that the hole in the door Striking a bloated blow for "real women" wasn't big enough for Kozakura's 44-inch bust everywhere, Chloe Marshall -- both 16 and a to fit through. If the t*ts don't fit, you must size 16 -- won the Miss Surrey beauty pageant, acquit. qualifying her to compete for Miss England. 81. "What Are You Doing Here?" Man 74. Man Robs Little Girl's Lemonade Asks Wife at Brothel Stand A Polish man got the shock of his life when he One of the few things more embarrassing than “Hey! Don’t worry! It’s only an ice visited a brothel and spotted his wife of 14 years being caught robbing a lemonade stand is being particle!” among the working girls. The couple decided to caught robbing a lemonade stand because the divorce. 12-year-old proprietor of said lemonade stand was able to run your sorry ass down. But that is 80. Topless Woman Lured Perverts in exactly what happened to 18-year-old Steven Sting Operation Tryon. Unfortunately for Steven, shame can't be Forty-two-year-old Robin Garrison probably used to buy more crack. thought it was his lucky day when he encountered a flirtatious topless woman in a 73. Dogs Risks Life to Save Kittens Cleveland park. Eventually she asked to see his from Fire penis, as flirtatious topless women sometimes Fire breaks out in home. Dog stays inside the do. Seconds after unzipping, a van filled with burning building guarding a cardboard box full undercover police officers pulled up, and of kittens. Kittens, rescued. Dog succumbs to Garrison was arrested for public indecency. smoke inhalation but is revived. Inter-species Needless to say, Garrison is claiming chivalry makes everyone say "AWWWW". entrapment. 72. 19-Year-Old Gets World's Longest 79. Woman Sues American Airlines Super Name over Masturbating Passenger A 19-year-old British man has officially A woman has filed a $200,000 lawsuit alleging changed his name to "Captain Fantastic Faster an American Airlines crew allowed another than Superman Spiderman Batman Wolverine passenger to go all "There's Something About Hulk and the Flash Combined." For accuracy's Mary" up in her hair. She had fallen asleep and sake, we insist he tack an "Able to Repel Real awoke to find the stranger finishing off on her Woman With a Single Ridiculous Name" onto tempting tresses. While this is clearly a horrible the back of that monstrosity. thing to have happen, many question why she is suing the airline, and not the pervert. 71. Cannabis Blunder at Tokyo Airport 78. Woman Wakes Up with New In an attempt to test airport security, customs Exotic Accent officers at Tokyo's Narita airport stuck 142 Cindy Lou Romberg woke up one morning with grams (1/3 of a pound) of marijuana in the brand new exotic accent, which sounds like a luggage of a random passenger. The test failed mix of Russian, German and Swedish. What miserably when drug-sniffing dogs were unable made this particularly odd is that Romberg had to detect the large cache. The marijuana has yet never once left her hometown of Port Angeles, to be returned. " Wash. Doctors attribute the vocal change to a delayed reaction from a severe brain injury The Top 100 Weird Stories of 2008 Romberg had suffered years earlier. It's called Foreign Accent Syndrome, and, while it's rare Continued on Page 6