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www.i-am-magazine.com22That%u2019s why people use anger when havingfights with their partners.They get criticized, they feel insignificant,they fear not being loved, and then theyuse anger to feel significant again.They use anger to feel noticed againwhen they feel like their partner didn%u2019tnotice them.This is especially true when someone%u2019sfeeling ignored by their partner day afterday, week after week. It looks like youjust start yelling at them for no realreason.How Do I Break Free Of This Pattern ToGet Back To Who I Really Am?Of course, we want to feel love &connection with another human being.Let%u2019s not pretend we don%u2019t need a man,woman, or friend in our life.This simple change could help you a lotboth in yourself and in relationships:%u201cLive out of love rather than trying to GETlove%u201d.What that means is feeling the love that%u2019snaturally inside of you rather than tryingto be significant to EARN love.We naturally love, and we as babiesexpress it effortlessly.It%u2019s only when we start getting classicalconditioning, usually around the age of 2that we start putting conditions on ourlove.Classical conditioning means you getrewarded for certain behavior andpunished for other behavior.Especially as babies where we takeeverything personally, we may believethat certain parts of ourselves are good,and other parts are bad.Some parts get us significance which wetranslate to love and safety, while otherparts get us punished and a loss of loveand possible safety.