Page 47 - Dr Pamela Peeke

"Five Letter Words"
Woman When I saw the return address, I cringed. It was my reminder to start my metabolism and help in the dreaded weight loss battle.
Twenty Five / Twenty Five

25 years old with 25 years of experience

By: Cynthia Burton

Marilyn Monroe was a size 14; thank you Norma Jean for providing
make an appointment for my annual well woman examination, this
those of us who are curvy (and were at birth a size 14) with realistic
year was going to be different.
expectations of womanhood, although Barbie is also fifty.
When did I go from worrying about four letter words to five letter
words? Raising my children I was always conscious of their fasci- It is good to be Queen, but when did I go from princess status to
nation with their body parts and how they worked; now I face the Queen? Princess implies youthfulness; having time to worry about
responsibility of making sure my body parts continue to work. We the tiara staying in position. Questioning, which ensemble should
all know the childish laughter produced by a bout of flatulence or its be worn with the brightly colored, patterned, two piece bathing suit
four letter equivalent. Now at twenty-five years old with twenty-five that so delicately outlines a perky body, and the flawless, waxed,
years of experience, I need to worry about five letter words. shaved, skin as it glistens in the sunlight. The appropriate hairstyle,
nail color and makeup for an outdoor activity, and, of course, which
Fifty is a new five letter word for me. So is aging, teeth (keep- bracelet, shoes and handbag should be worn. Queen denotes age,
ing them), flash (as in hot flash), heart (not the proverbial broken sleep deprivation, corsets or Spanx, not the kind given as a punish-
heart but now heart health and ment, but the kind older women use
the blood supply pumping to as undergarments to reposition all the
it), cream (moisturizing, eye, cellulite so they can wear the dress
wrinkle, antiaging, dry skin, foot, they wore last summer.
SPF), fiber and colon.
Queen of my castle does come with
And should I dare to mention its privileges; I am honored with over-
hemorrhoid: A double whammy seeing the cleanliness of my throne,
five letter word. the pressing duty of laundering the
fine linens and of course designing
Heels, my beautiful sexy stilet- the nightly menu. After a difficult day
tos, no longer practical (my of struggling with the state of my
health insurance is already family’s economy, Jenny Craig is an San Diego
more expensive than my car expected dinner guest. The politi- Woman
payment), are replaced by new, cally correct Queen that I am, Jenny
leather walking shoes. and my lean husband have nothing
in common, so the menu will have
If fifty is the new forty, so be it. cuisine for Jenny and me and meat 47
I will grow my red locks long to and potatoes for my King.
please my husband although
my hairdresser informs me she Maturity can be beneficial. Mother
is monitoring my hair loss each Nature now bequeaths her gift on
visit. the young ones. Father Time does
provide wisdom. Experience is a gift
If I experience a flash and money cannot buy. The lessons I
happen to wipe my face with a have learned have been expensive;
napkin that leaves particles of how thankful I am to not be twenty-
its recycled paper in the wrinkles five again. I could not afford them.
of my face, I will handle it with
grace and dignity. The day following my first, big screen
debut, I plan to pick up my four-year-
I will stand erect (another five old granddaughter. We will have our
letter word) during my an- mani-pedis done, prepare a menu
nual mammogram. I will lovingly, using recipes from her ingredient
gently, and apologetically hoist my older bosom on to that cold slab, book, look for bugs in the yard, dress up my poor Pugs in ridiculous
although mildly irked at the thought of becoming breakfast food at outfits, who lovingly and instinctively know the laughter produced
the local pancake house. Though they are non-milk producing, they by this little jewel is a gift from heaven and whose innocence and
are not yet candidates for filet mignon. I am appreciating my new wonderful whimsical talent is to make bubbles in the bathtub without
walking shoes and how many miles women have walked in those the aid of Mr. Bubble. Finally we will do my favorite five letter word
types of leather walking shoes, to give me the opportunity to still be - laugh.
a combo menu item.
It is good to be twenty-five with twenty-five years of experience.
I will lie quietly while I undergo that dreaded colonoscopy and hope
I remember not to use the glitter soap that morning during my show-
er. On the bright side, void of excess body fluid, maybe it will jump-
Issue 2, 2009