Page 52 - Final Inspirational Women Issue

He Said She Said

Robert Judith A.
Tussey Habert

Change is difficult, seemingly impossible. From I am truly an advocate of equal rights between the sexes. I am not in favor of litigious
racial bias to gender bias to age bias, across the board individuals looking for a way to make a buck, while they attempt to make you believe they
society has a mandate for change that is rarely met are doing it for the good of our country. For decades women have suffered the lower pay
with open arms. Whether we like it or not people don’t for doing the same job, and to date, in 2018 they are still being penalized for not having a
enjoy altering their perceptions and beliefs. It takes penis.
generations for real change despite legislation and Now some greedy men are saying, wait being at the head of the herd for centuries just
good intentions. That said, altering ‘societal norms’ is isn’t enough. We need to crash an innocent “Girls Night Out,” to make a point. But, what
necessary for the progression and growth in a forward- point are they making? That their life would not be complete if they don’t ruin an event for
thinking world. Join the crowd or sit on the sidelines, women. One where women can let down their hair and not care about their makeup being
either way, it’s going to happen. perfect or wearing that dreaded pair of spanks. Do men not realize how much work most
Lately, I’ve been hearing a lot about discrimination women put into looking perfect around men. Do men not realize that many of the hoops
against men. Articles and blogs and vlogs all speaking we jump through are for them to think positively about us? Once in a while, a woman or
about men being marginalized and many men taking women’s group will give other women a break. Hey, let’s enjoy a night out when all we think
umbrage at the fact we are being pushed into the corner about is having fun, not how we look or what the men in the room will be saying about us.
of the conversation on equality. One man is suing a There are still so many areas in which women are not allowed to participate. Read
women’s group [Here in San Diego] for not including the cover story, and maybe it will hit home that in 149 years there has never been a female
men in one of their events – a girl’s night out dancing. major league baseball player. How many women are down at Petco Park with picket signs
For generations, women have wanted to join men-only and filing lawsuits?
clubs, gyms, organizations, Boy Scouts (Boy Scouts will No one denies the fact that business has been a bastion of male society for years. So
now be called Scouts as the young ladies join the ranks), why do men have a problem when women organize and attend seminars and other
the military, corporate boardrooms and such, and it has functions to help them gain knowledge of the business world. It was noted in the 70’s
taken its toll on the larger issue of gender equality. And, that lower-income youths needed some help in being able to attend college, so they could
men are fighting back with the same argument. Why compete with those who were better off economically. These wealthier students most likely
not? received a better education during grades k-12. I don’t recall stories about well-off high
On the one hand, if women want equality on all schoolers objecting or suing those who were given opportunities to better themselves and
issues, then we have to extend men the same courtesy their station in life? No, they welcomed the new competition and believed, in the long run, it
(look, I know that for years men ran the world – I don’t would be better for our country. Why can’t men feel the same way about these women-only
disagree with that point). Some women are arguing for networking events, unless they are afraid of having to compete with women? Maybe the
this lawsuit. On the other hand – why? Some say the fact that more women are opening businesses today than men does give them a reason to
natural flow of this change will include men. I don’t see fear allowing women to get up to speed in the business arena.
it that way. I have watched, for decades, this battle for I guess we will have to start banning man caves too pretty soon, and maybe all dressing
what’s right against what’s wrong. From the feminism of rooms at spas or gyms now have to be open to both men and women since wouldn’t we be
the sixties to the neo-feminism of today, the battle call discriminating calling an area the Women’s Locker Room and not allowing men to enter?
is the same, me first. I have always been on the side of Restrooms would have to come under fire as well. No more men’s or women’s restroom since
equal pay and equal treatment. My ten years of articles that is discriminating telling a man he can’t go in a women’s restroom. Do we realize how
in this magazine support that. But I am also seeing the out of control this concept can become?
trend of marginalization of men as a means to achieve If men have chambers of commerce with men’s groups and women have networking
equality for women. Men, for centuries, have had it events that are women focused, why is there such an issue? I truly would understand and
their way. But, not all men were the bad guys. It truly agree if a service was only available to women and not men, but there are many men’s
is time for an aggressive change for women. But do not organizations out there that provide the same service as women’s groups. So what makes it
leave the good and true men out of the equation. I have so necessary for these men to join in on the women organized and run events.
said many times over the years that a partner in change At San Diego Woman Magazine, we have male writers and contributors, we provide
is far more effective than leaving your advocates at the topics that may be of interest to both men and women, and as you are reading, we run a
altar. He Said/She Said column allowing both the male and female opinion to be voiced. Should
If total equality is the goal then shouldn’t we we be forced to change the name of our publication to appease a group of men who find
leave the seats up and the doors unopened? You get it distasteful? At San Diego Women all men are welcome to attend any of our events or
the picture. If we can agree that we are all in this functions, but rarely are they busting down the doors to attend. Why is this? Because I do
together, then we better make this work for all. Our believe both genders need time to bond with their own gender. Not everything has to be a
world is moving faster than at any time in history, group activity.
and we all need to be on the right track making the The Girls Night Out event was not the only recent lawsuit. It seems a local law firm has
necessary changes to build a foundation of equality and been specializing in these sort of cases, with positive outcomes. I do understand the need to
equanimity. Anything less will drag us all down in an speak up when you feel you are being discriminated against, but how about suing for $1 if
age where too few have too much power. you are only doing so to prove a point or champion a cause?

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