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nearer to home than the shelves of our local fancy goods store. Only when we conduct the exercise of digging deep, will we discover what, if anything is
actually missing and prepare ourselves for the real work to be done to restore happiness to our lives.

Gradually, over a period of months and years, without necessarily realising it was happening, and for our own reasons, we created what we thought were
protective layers of denial for ourselves. Those protective layers seemed to serve a purpose, but what they actually did was to obstruct our path to true happiness.

All forms of denial are a kind of survival mechanism that manifest themselves when we feel all that we have built, created or worked so hard to achieve is
threatened by our inner truths. We create a version of truth, a mask if you like, that we wear with all those around us, that helps us get through each day.

Denial becomes very much like a life jacket that will keep us afloat in a sea of uncertainty. We tell ourselves that if we can only hang onto denial, we
will not drown. So we cling onto it, convincing ourselves that this is as close to true happiness we will ever get. If it is allowed to go on for too long,
we even begin to believe that this is all we deserve and our self worth plummets.

The truth is, the longer we stay in denial, the deeper and thicker the water and the more we begin to drown in it, until finally, we reach those cross
roads where all we want is the truth, that authentic, happy life we all deserve.

Most people at some time or another, use denial as a strategy for survival. It is only when we look inward at the causes of our unhappiness that we can see how
destructive it really is. Persistent denial obstructs our path to true happiness and sabotages our ability to have meaningful and truly intimate loving relationships.

Will the real me please stand up? Reclaiming Your Authentic Self

Having recognised that we may have got lost on the way to our true happiness, we realise that we may have planned our lives while still very young, perhaps
too influenced by family and friends, unresolved issues from childhood, or values we feel were imposed on us by society. Sometimes it is a shock to realise
the life plan we’ve been using is ten, twenty or thirty years out of date, based on values that no longer apply to us. When we strip our life plan down, we may
even realise that many of our plans or goals belong to someone else, and are no longer plans we would seek to pursue.

On this voyage of self discovery, it is inevitable that we ask ourselves the question “Will the real me please stand up?” Asking the question takes immense
emotional courage, which is why denial is so often chosen as the easier option. Answering the question takes even more courage, courage to face the
uncomfortable truth, with relentless honesty and perseverance.

We must be prepared to dig as deep as is necessary to get to the truth of what will really make us happy. We must face parts of ourselves we have ignored or
denied, face truths we have evaded, confront longings and dreams we have denied ourselves. The truth is closer than you think, inside of you right now. It is
not a matter of searching for it, but through a willingness to see it, uncovering it by removing all the masks, denials and other strategies we have used to keep
it hidden.
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