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Rena Ariel
Just one

Candle

he experience of G-d’s A sliver of light. Sudden understanding. that is the secret of the Jewish holidays.
withdrawal (hester panim) is That is the purpose of Chanukah. The Historical memory translated into daily
T familiar to many of us. Who obligation to find the small spark of action. The past is channeled through
hasn’t confronted a reality of terrible, light, not in an illuminated world, but the present for the benefit of the future.
unbearable pain? Who hasn’t struggled in a dark one. Good doesn’t appear only The holidays not only illuminate the
with profound questions surrounding as a powerful spring-like revelation, but past but demand a pulsating spiritual life
difficult life situations? Who hasn’t from an opposite, winter-like place. We in the present.
experienced pain with no meaning, all have moments of darkness in our
suffering with no purpose? lives, within us, where we need that We found part of our meaning by
small, barely flickering candle. building “Kerem Hallel” (Hallel’s
That is how we felt after our 13 and a
half-year-old daughter, Hallel Yaffa, was The Hallel prayer, too, does not only Vineyard) – an area of our home filled
murdered in her bed at home in broad contain moments of climactic joy; it with vines and grapes, which symbolize
daylight just two and a half years ago. A includes the verse: “The bonds of death deep roots in the Land and the sanctity
pure, beautiful child; the victim of pure, encompassed me, the anguish of the and blessings of wine. It is an area
brutal hatred. grave came upon me.” privileged to have received Ya’akov’s
blessing to Yehuda and from then until
Days when everything was despondent, We can also identify this duality in the now has produced fruit in abundance.
the world dark. famous dispute between Beit Hillel and Vines gripping the ground symbolize
Beit Shammai concerning how many
We called her Hallel because she was candles we light each night. our victory and resilience in the face of
born soon after Chanukah, when we sing suffering and pain.
Hallel every day, adding praises to our Do we begin with one small candle and
light and joy. allow a process of intensification? Or We found another small candle too, a
perhaps the opposite – in the war against small flame that disseminates light –
Chanukah arrives at the end of Kislev, darkness, should we use all the light “Pirkei Hallel,” a book for bat mitzvah
during the shortest days of the year, from the outset? As we know, we act like girls and their mothers, which enables
and when the moon is almost invisible, the former, like Beit Hillel. them to embark on a shared journey; a
fading before it reappears. It is the only book written in tears that illuminates
holiday celebrated at the end of the There are times when we can barely Hallel’s sparkling personality, intended
month, rather than the middle, when the grasp even one candle. to inspire the 12-year-old reader.
moon’s light is brightest.
How difficult it is to shield that flame so
The Midrash (Avoda Zara 8a) explains it doesn’t blow out. And how even more Perhaps it is only because we find the
Chanukah’s original background as challenging it is to allow it to light the strength to light our own one small light
associated with the time of Creation. way. that we are able to shine outwards, give
Adam was conscious of the experience How can we make that candle praise and publicize our miracles.
of G-d’s contraction (tzimtzum) meaningful, transforming a life of fate
and withdrawal (hester) due to the into a life of destiny?
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shortening day. He feared it was in 1 A concept expressed by Rav Soloveitchik.
punishment for his sin. He was in a state Following Hallel’s murder, we searched
of existential dread of destruction and for new meaning for existence. How
annihilation until he witnessed the light could we transform the memory of our Rena Ariel is the mother of Hallel Yaffa,
of dawn. Hallel into a living entity? After all, who was killed by a terrorist in 2016

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