Page 215 - Reason To Sing by Kelita Haverland
P. 215

Chapter  Thirty-Six


            lethal chill inside the van. Today the atmosphere is positively
            frigid. We are back to silent détente.
               Even with no conversation, I am grateful for the sound of
            wheels on asphalt, helping to drown out the deafening chatter
            in my overactive mind. The occasional AM radio station also
            provides a welcome reprieve. But hearing the strains of “If You
            Don’t Know Me By Now” saddens me. I try not to cry. I want
            to weep buckets and watch all my inner pain wash away down
            the barren highway. I feel so many things and am unable to
            articulate any of them.
               As the long hours drag on, the tension between Hudson and
            me increases. Like a worn rubber band, stretched far beyond its
            limit, every muscle in me is tense. My body is preparing itself
            for that inevitable moment when the band breaks and the jolt
            of the snap sends my heart flailing. We are just six hours north
            of our destination.
               Finally – it happens. Hudson’s band snaps and all hell
            breaks loose. He can no longer contain his rage and it spills out
            of him like molten lava. He is seething!
               “I know something is going on with him! HIM! That damn
            guy. You can’t tell me that it’s not! Don’t you dare lie to me!” His
            hands are on the wheel but his eyes are on me. I am terrified he
            will drive us right off the road.
               “There is nothing going on. I don’t know what you’re talking
            about,” I respond softly, trying my best to look sincere. “Please
            keep your eyes on the road.”
               The man is angry, exhausted and absolutely livid. He is
            losing it. Losing everything. Losing control over me. Over our
            lives. Our marriage. Our business. Losing his mind.
               I know I need to protect myself. I need to stay strong.
            Maintain order. Hold it together, Kelita. Hold it together. Hold it
            together.


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