Page 215 - Reason To Sing by Kelita Haverland
P. 215
Chapter Thirty-Six
lethal chill inside the van. Today the atmosphere is positively
frigid. We are back to silent détente.
Even with no conversation, I am grateful for the sound of
wheels on asphalt, helping to drown out the deafening chatter
in my overactive mind. The occasional AM radio station also
provides a welcome reprieve. But hearing the strains of “If You
Don’t Know Me By Now” saddens me. I try not to cry. I want
to weep buckets and watch all my inner pain wash away down
the barren highway. I feel so many things and am unable to
articulate any of them.
As the long hours drag on, the tension between Hudson and
me increases. Like a worn rubber band, stretched far beyond its
limit, every muscle in me is tense. My body is preparing itself
for that inevitable moment when the band breaks and the jolt
of the snap sends my heart flailing. We are just six hours north
of our destination.
Finally – it happens. Hudson’s band snaps and all hell
breaks loose. He can no longer contain his rage and it spills out
of him like molten lava. He is seething!
“I know something is going on with him! HIM! That damn
guy. You can’t tell me that it’s not! Don’t you dare lie to me!” His
hands are on the wheel but his eyes are on me. I am terrified he
will drive us right off the road.
“There is nothing going on. I don’t know what you’re talking
about,” I respond softly, trying my best to look sincere. “Please
keep your eyes on the road.”
The man is angry, exhausted and absolutely livid. He is
losing it. Losing everything. Losing control over me. Over our
lives. Our marriage. Our business. Losing his mind.
I know I need to protect myself. I need to stay strong.
Maintain order. Hold it together, Kelita. Hold it together. Hold it
together.
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