Page 70 - Relationships101 A Guide To Building Healthy Relationships Final 1

Make sure you give it a time frame. Let them know what that time frame is; write a
contract for both of you to sign and stick to the agreement! It could be one month, three
months, six months, or a year––less time will be needed to resolve minor issues, but more
time will be needed for resolving major issues.

Determine a time frame that is comfortable for you, but do not give it too much time. They
need to get off their butt and grow. They did not take the initiative to grow on their own,
which is why you are tired and want to leave in the first place. Now they have to grow if
they want the relationship! Let them do it.

Offer them this handbook as part of the healing process. Let them know that if they do not
give you a reason to stay, you are leaving. What they do from that moment on will help
you decide if you should stay, and it will give you some indication of what may come next.
But do not put your guard down. Be nice, but stick to your guns. You want things to
change for the better.

Remember what you learned about relations, symbiotic relationships, positive-sum and
zero-sum relationships. Handle your relationship issues and decisions in a manner that is
healthy and productive. It is your life. All choices regarding you are ultimately yours. If
you decide to leave the relationship or marriage, do not get into another relationship right
away. Take your time. With every relationship, you lose valuable time and energy that you
cannot get back.

So take your time, study this handbook, live life, and have fun. Take the time you need to
learn who you are and how to make better love choices. This way, when you do choose
someone again, you have a better chance of having a healthy relationship that leads to
marriage––and not the divorce court.

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