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3. His intent should be purposeful, and he should reflect whether 2 that if one is asked about a person whom he knows committed a great
or not his words will truly be beneficial.
4. If he can, he should try to achieve the same purpose without
having to speak about him.
5. He should not harm him directly with his words.
Although it is possible that the person now regrets what he did
and made up his mind not to do it again, one should be concerned
about this possibility and protect the would-be employer from him.
From the simple understanding of the Chafetz Chaim, it seems that
he only saw the man stealing once, but we still have to consider that
he may continue to steal. [Here is evidence to support the words of
my father-in-law (above), that although the young woman regretted
her act of attempted suicide and completely repented, one still has to
worry that she may attempt suicide once again.]
The Minchas Yitzchak considers the status of a person who sinned
once in his youth. (Vol. 6, #139) He bases his opinion on Tractate
Taanis (16a), which states that one of the characteristics of a cantor is
that he should be above reproach, meaning that he did not have a bad
reputation during his childhood, even if he subsequently repented. (It
would have been superfluous for the Gemara to refer to someone who
had not repented, for obviously, a sinner cannot serve as a cantor.)
The Bi’ur Halacha explains (#53:5, s.v. d’mikol makom) that the Rama
rules that if a person commits a sin only once, but intentionally, then
even if he repented he is halachically considered someone with a “bad
name.”
The defect of not having a good name applies to shidduchim as well.
As explained in Hagahos Mordechai, (cited in Beis Yosef Yoreh De’ah
#228, s.v. katuv, p. 479) what happens if an engaged couple accepted
upon themselves cherem for reneging on the engagement, and then
the man became an apostate? If she came to beis din when he was an
apostate, and they permitted her to marry someone else, and then he
repented, she still has permission to marry someone else. If she had
not received permission to marry another and he already repented,
then she has to ask a Torah scholar. The Minchas Yitzchak concludes
34 1 Medical-HalacHic Responsa of Rav ZilbeRstein
sin in his youth, and he has heard nothing about the sinner since,
and [the sinner] is studying Torah, then one should not reveal his
past sins. However, if he sinned a number of times, and it is unclear
whether he repented, then one should reveal his past. Even if he did
repent, there is still room to consider whether it is necessary to reveal
his past…
Considering the words of the Minchas Yitzchak in regard to our
case, if several years have passed since the young woman’s attempted
suicide, and no further reports were heard about her in the interim,
perhaps she is not obligated to reveal her past, because the presump-
tion is that she is healthy.

In Orchos Rabbenu (Vol. 1, p. 266) it says that mental illness in three
brothers or in the father, son and grandson is called a presumption
and one should not marry into that family. If there are other mentally
ill relatives, that is not considered a presumption. Furthermore, if any
member of the family with a presumption of mental illness has three
healthy children of his own, the presumption no longer applies to
him, and he is like any other person in this respect. This resembles a
goring ox who sees three oxen and does not gore them; the ox reverts,
halachically to a simple, non-goring ox.
Perhaps this applies in our case if the young woman is no longer
in the unfavorable condition of her past, such as if she went through
several difficult situations and did not attempt suicide again, then
perhaps she has lost her presumption of being ill and she does not
have to reveal her past. This requires further study. Perhaps this is
like a thief who has abandoned his crooked ways. Maybe if the young
woman has strengthened her fear of heaven, we can assume she will
not attempt to kill herself again and therefore she does need not re-
veal her past.
In Responsa Iggros Moshe (Orach Chaim, Vol. 4 #118) there is a dis-
cussion about a young girl who sinned. Is she obligated to reveal her
sin to a potential spouse? Rav Moshe rules that she must definitely tell
Revealing a bride's earlier attempt at suicide 2 35