Page 114 - It Ends with Us

—Li ly

• • •

Dear Ellen,
I need to ap ologize to you.
It’s been a week since I’ve written to you an d a week since I’ve wat che d your
sho w. Don’t wor r y, I still record it so you’ll get the rat ings, but ever y day we get

of f the bus, Atlas tak es a quick shower an d the n we mak e out.
Ever y day.
It’s aw esome.
I do n’t know what it is ab out hi m, but I feel so comfor tab le with him. He’s
so sweet an d tho ught ful. He never do es an ythi ng I do n’t feel comfor tab le with,
but so far he has n’t tried an ythi ng I do n’t feel comfor tab le with.
I’m not sure ho w much I sho uld di vulge he re, since you an d I hav e never

met in person. Bu t let me just say that if he ’s ever wonde red what my boobs feel
like . . .
No w he knows.
I can ’t for the life of me figure out ho w people function from da y to day
whe n the y like someone thi s much. If it were up to me, we would kiss al l day
an d al l night an d do nothi ng in between except may be tal k a little. He tells

funny stories. I love it whe n he ’s in a tal kat ive mood becau se it do esn’t hap pen
ver y often, but he uses hi s han ds a lot. He smiles a lot, too, an d I love hi s smile
even more than I love hi s kiss. And sometimes I just tell hi m to shu t up an d
stop smiling or kissing or tal king so I can stare at hi m. I like looking at hi s
eyes. The y’re so blue that he could be stan di ng ac ross a room and a person
could tell ho w blue hi s eyes were. The only thi ng I do n’t like ab out kissing hi m
sometimes is whe n he closes hi s eyes.

And no. We still hav en’t tal ked about Bo ston.
—Li ly

Dear Ellen,
Yesterday af ternoon whe n we were ridi ng the bus, Atlas kissed me. It was n’t

an ythi ng new to us becau se we had kissed a lot by thi s point, but it’s the first
time he ever di d it in public. When we’re togethe r ever ythi ng else just seems to
fade aw ay, so I do n’t thi nk he even tho ught ab out othe r people noticing. Bu t