Page 135 - Essentials of Human Communication

114 ChaPter 5 Nonverbal Messages

DecODINg skIlls
When you make judgments or draw conclusions about another person on the basis of her or
his nonverbal messages, consider these suggestions:
● be tentative. Resist the temptation to draw conclusions from nonverbal behaviors. Instead,
develop hypotheses (educated guesses) about what is going on, and test the validity of your
hypotheses on the basis of other evidence.
● when making judgments, mindfully seek alternative judgments. Your first judgment may
be in error, and one good way to test it is to consider alternative judgments. When your
romantic partner creates a greater than normal distance in relation to you, it may signal
an annoyance with you; but it can also signal that your partner needs some space to think
something out.
● Notice that messages come from many different channels and that reasonably accurate
judgments can only be made when multiple channels are taken into consideration.
Although textbooks (like this one) must present the areas of nonverbal communica-
tion separately, the various elements all work together in actual communication
situations.
● Consider the possibility that you are incorrect, even after you’ve explored the different
channels. This is especially true when you make a judgment that another person is lying,
based on, say, eye avoidance or long pauses. These nonverbal signals may mean many
things (as well as the possibility of lying).
● interpret your judgments and conclusions against a cultural context. For example,
Communication
Choice Point think about whether you are interpreting the nonverbal behavior of someone
Demonstrating through its meaning only in your own culture. So, if you interpret someone’s
“overly close” talking distance as intrusive or pushy because that’s your cul-
credibility ture’s interpretation, you may miss the possibility that this distance is simply
At work people don’t attri- standard in the other person’s culture; or it’s a way of signaling closeness and
bute any credibility to you, although you’re
probably as competent as anyone else. You friendliness.
need to increase the nonverbal credibility ● Consider the multitude of factors that can influence the way a person behaves
cues you give off. What nonverbal cues can nonverbally; for example, a person’s physical condition, personality, or particular
you use to communicate your competence and situation may all influence a person’s nonverbal communication. An upset stom-
ability? How might you begin to integrate these ach may be more influential in unpleasant expressions than any communication
into your everyday interactions? factor. A low grade in an exam may make your normally pleasant roommate scowl
and grumble. Without knowing these factors, it’s difficult to make an accurate
judgment.

eNcODINg skIlls

When using nonverbal messages to express your meanings, consider these suggestions:
Watch the Video ● Think about your choices for your nonverbal communication just as you do for your verbal
“Go for It” at messages. Identify and think mindfully about the choices you have available for commu-
MyCommunicationLab
nicating what you want to communicate.
● Keep your nonverbal messages consistent with your verbal messages; avoid sending verbal
messages that say one thing and nonverbal messages that say something else—at least not
when you want to be believed.
● Monitor your own nonverbal messages with the same care that you monitor your verbal mes-
sages. If it’s not appropriate to say “this meal is terrible,” then it’s not appropriate to have a
negative expression when you’re asked if you want seconds.
● Avoid extremes and monotony. Too little nonverbal communication or too much are likely
to be responded to negatively. Similarly, always giving the same nonverbal message—say,
continually smiling and nodding your head when listening to a friend’s long story—is
likely to be seen as insincere.