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If someone compliments you, simply say Thank you. Stop yourself from saying: “Oh, no I’m not”
when someone tells you something that is kind. Furthermore, never take a compliment or an
insult too seriously, because this too has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with the
other person’s perceptions.
I used to be so hard on myself. Always wanting to feel “good enough.” It has taken 20 years to
find my worth from the inside out, and to stop judging or comparing myself to others. Each
person on our planet is special. We have to learn to place ourselves on equal footing with all of
humanity. So I am no better and no worse than a person living on the street. We are all equal.

I used to think if I had a 28” or 30” waist that would make me more acceptable to myself. I then
realised that when I got down to a 30” waist, I was no happier because of it. I realised that
clothing is made in all sizes, and I do not have to look like a film star or sports personality to feel
more acceptable to myself. Once I gave myself permission to be good enough, just as I am, the
self judgment stopped, and so did the inner feelings of inadequacy. There are many people
that have it all on the outside, and still feel inadequate deep down within. I was no exception.

However, once you really turn that around, and fully accept yourself, even with your so-called
flaws, then you can begin a journey that is filled with love, and joy, rather than disharmony
within.

No matter what you think will make you more worthy, find an example of someone else that has
that exact condition that you do not judge. Then, stop judging yourself completely.
You can only feel the joy of life when your mind is free from self imposed limitations and

negative judgment. Be an example of your radiant self that does lie within, by being and sharing
you greatest inner qualities, and bring those out. Focus on all of the good that you are, so that
you will always feel good enough and accept yourself no matter what.
Healthy alternatives to irrational thinking about unconditional love and acceptance

Irrational: You should always obey rules, accept limits, meet another's expectations and
conditions before you can expect that other to accept and love you.

Healthy: Following rules, accepting limits, and meeting expectations and conditions are often
necessary for survival in this world but are not necessary conditions to be accepted and loved
by others.

Irrational: Parents should require their children to obey their rules, accepting limits set, and meet
up to the expectations and conditions set for them before the parents show acceptance and
love for the children.

Healthy: Parents first need to accept and love the child because the child exists. Only once the
child feels this acceptance and love will the child more likely obey the rules, accept limits, and
meet the expectations in a healthy way.
Irrational: Using unconditional acceptance and love to get others "to do'' for you is manipulating
others to benefit yourself. It is a destructive behaviour.