Page 53 - Mindfulness Meets Emotional Awareness Sample Book

P. 53

I find that brainstorming everything I think and feel on to a
sheet of paper is a really good way of being able to stand back
from the immediacy of the situation.
Sometimes I might then write a letter to clarify what I wish to
say. My intention at this stage isn’t to send the letter, it simply
serves as a tool of reference to support me in working out how
best to proceed.

I then go on to edit this information until it contains all of the
relevant points that I need to make, the range of potential
choices that are available to me and any conclusions and
subsequent decisions that I have come to.

• Take considered action. Using the information
available to you and your awareness of your choices
and possible decisions, take action accordingly.

Assertiveness isn’t about asserting our opinion over the
opinion of another or at the expense of the opinion of another.
It is not a competition.

True assertiveness is an ability to own and voice our own
opinion within a state of mutual recognition from a base of
healthy self-responsibility and healthy self-care. In situations
that involve negotiation with others, any reasonable caring
person will welcome an opportunity for discussion and
potential resolution.

In conversation, a useful tip is to always own your position,
always bring the situation back to yourself and speak about
the way that you feel rather than pointing the finger at the
other person. For example:

“I find myself feeling…” rather than “You make me feel…”

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