Page 219 - EFI-RAV ZILBERSTIN_VOL 8.EFI-RAV ZILBERSTIN_VOL 8.1A

Pg: 219 - 7-Back 21-10-31

tional damage is no different. If the quarrel is harming the children,
intervention is necessary to try and restore peace between the parents
in order to avoid violating “do not stand idly by the [spilled] blood of
your colleague” in regard to the children. Our teachers have discussed
the case of a child whose father beats him cruelly in contravention
of Torah law and ruled that he should be removed from the father’s
custody and that beis din must find him a guardian.1

Let us now discuss a case where the couple has no children [who
are suffering from the discord between them]. Is there an obligation
to intervene and try to reconcile them when they are not interested
owing to their embarrassment?

In maseches Shabbos (108a) the gemara relates that Shmuel and
Karna were sitting on the bank of the River Malka and they heard
that a great man was traveling on the approaching boat. Shmuel, who
was an expert physician, noticed that the river’s waters were putrid
and judged that the great man would certainly drink from the water
and would therefore develop an intestinal ailment. (see Tosfos ibid.)
Shmuel told Karna, “Go and gain an impression of him; if he is a
scholar I will heal him.” Karna investigated and found him to be a
great Torah scholar – he was the amora-tanna, Rav. Shmuel invit-
ed him to his home, fed him barley bread and small fish, and gave
him beer to drink [laxative foods], instructing that Rav should not
be shown where the bathroom was located until “all the waste in his
intestines would churn and liquefy” and he would be cured.

This treatment was administered against Rav’s will, as is evident
from the gemara there. We therefore see that an expert physician is
allowed to heal a patient against his will, even if the patient’s ailment
is not dangerous. [Otherwise Shmuel would have done so even had
the patient not been a Torah scholar.]

Applying this to our case, we can learn that it is correct to intervene

1. See the pamphlet Halachah Urefuah Vol, 1, pg. 336. See further, siman 271, where
we note that in certain cases the child is not removed from the parents’ care [see
there, for further details of these halachos] and at any rate, the child should not
be put up for adoption, as is usual today.

Honoring parents and slander in psychotherapy 2 203