Page 152 - The Freckled Eye - Book

I would allow myself some time to cry, because when you’re facing mortality
it’s a big deal. Then I’d pull myself together. I would always remember to tell
myself my mantra, to help me stay focused on the right things.

I would say to myself, “I had eye cancer. I’ve done all that I can do. I’ve
caught it early and I’m thankful for that. I have the good eye cancer and now
with the radiation, it’s killed it. Because of this experience, I will be monitored
over the next 10 years, so if anything should pop up, for any reason, we’ll be
on top of it. I will continue to be proactive and do all I can do to get healthy.

Today I am good and I’m thankful.” This really helps me get back on track to
feeling better. Because I know there are things I can’t control and there’s no sense on
stressing over them. The things I can control, I’m doing and that’s where I find my
peace to bring me back.

Having the bad thoughts are natural, and do build up at times. So, I allow myself a
space to let it out. I also talk with my friends and family about my fears, but sometimes
you need you. That’s why it’s important for me to have my own guiding light of positive
thoughts to bring me back into the moment and for that I’m grateful.

I remember mom saying that sometimes you must be your own hero. Find and make
your own happiness, even if it’s small. Just keep stepping forward and you'll find your
way. I’m thankful to have learned that type of thinking from her. It was the most
important thing to help me through this.

(Special Note) Thank you, mommy. You are always with me, in my heart and mind,
even when you’re not physically close. You are ALWAYS RIGHT HERE with me, no
matter what... I hear you. At least, for now, you’re only a phone call a way to help get
me back on track.

FEBRUARY 28 –