Page 219 - The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts

LOVING THE UNLOVELY

It was a beautiful September Saturday. My wife and I were
strolling through Reynolda Gardens, enjoying the flora,
some of which had been imported from around the world.
The gardens had originally been developed by R. J.
Reynolds, the tobacco magnate, as a part of his country
estate. They are now a part of the Wake Forest University
campus. We had just passed the rose garden when I
noticed Ann, a woman who had begun counseling two
weeks earlier, approaching us. She was looking down at
the cobblestone walkway and appeared to be in deep
thought. When I greeted her, she was startled but looked up
and smiled. I introduced her to Karolyn, and we exchanged
pleasantries. Then, without any lead-in, she asked me one
of the most profound questions I have ever heard: “Dr.
Chapman, is it possible to love someone whom you hate?”
I knew the question was born of deep hurt and
deserved a thoughtful answer. I knew that I would be seeing
her the following week for another counseling appointment,
so I said, “Ann, that is one of the most thought-provoking
questions I have ever heard. Why don’t we discuss that next
week?” She agreed, and Karolyn and I continued our stroll.