Page 224 - The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts

great deal of respect for the teachings of Jesus.”
She nodded affirmingly. I continued, “I want to read
something that Jesus once said that I think has some
application to your marriage.” I read slowly and deliberately.
“‘I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good
to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for
those who mistreat you…. Do to others as you would have
them do to you. If you love those who love you, what credit
is that to you? Even “sinners” love those who love them.’
“Does that sound like your husband? Has he treated
you as an enemy rather than as a friend?” I inquired.
She nodded her head affirmingly.
“Has he ever cursed you?” I asked.
“Many times.”
“Has he ever mistreated you?”
“Often.”
“And has he told you that he hates you?”
“Yes.”
“Ann, if you are willing, I would like to do an
experiment. I would like to see what would happen if we
apply this principle to your marriage. Let me explain what I
mean.” I went on to explain to Ann the concept of the
emotional tank and the fact that when the tank is low, as
hers was, we have no love feelings toward our spouse but
simply experience emptiness and pain. Since love is such
a deep emotional need, the lack of it is perhaps our
deepest emotional pain. I told her that if we could learn to
speak each other’s primary love language, that emotional