Page 42 - STMT 2nd Edition
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Studies show that being friends pays off over time,
ensuring a closer, sexier union. And don’t forget to
make time for intimacy, even if you must log it in
your day planner.
3. Stop Blaming Your Partner for
Everything That’s Wrong
It’s tempting to blame your partner when you feel angry, disappointed,
bored, betrayed or stressed out about your relationship.
The next step is seeing your mate as the one who must change for the
relationship to improve.
Trying to improve your partner puts him on the defensive and casts you
in a negative light.
The result? Nobody changes. Nobody takes responsibility. Everyone is
unhappy. And making your partner the bad guy means ignoring the 90
per cent of him that’s good.
The True Fix: Change Yourself.
When you address your own flaws and seek the best in your companion,
magic happens. Optimism increases. Your partner feels better because he
or she feels appreciated, not chastised. And you both feel motivated to
change in ways that lead to even more joy.
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