Page 497 - the-brothers-karamazov

him gaily.
‘As to yesterday, I believe you, but as for to-day, it is dif-
ficult to agree with your opinion,’ said he.
‘Bravo,’ I cried, clapping my hands. ‘I agree with you
there too, I have deserved it!’
‘Will you shoot, sir, or not?’
‘No, I won’t,’ I said; ‘if you like, fire at me again, but it
would be better for you not to fire.’
The seconds, especially mine, were shouting too: ‘Can
you disgrace the regiment like this, facing your antagonist
and begging his forgiveness! If I’d only known this!’
I stood facing them all, not laughing now.
‘Gentlemen,’ I said, ‘is it really so wonderful in these days
to find a man who can repent of his stupidity and publicly
confess his wrongdoing?’
‘But not in a duel,’ cried my second again.
‘That’s what’s so strange,’ I said. ‘For I ought to have
owned my fault as soon as I got here, before he had fired
a shot, before leading him into a great and deadly sin; but
we have made our life so grotesque, that to act in that way
would have been almost impossible, for only after I had
faced his shot at the distance of twelve paces could my
words have any significance for him, and if I had spoken
before, he would have said, ‘He is a coward, the sight of the
pistols has frightened him, no use to listen to him.’ Gen-
tlemen,’ I cried suddenly, speaking straight from my heart,
‘look around you at the gifts of God, the clear sky, the pure
air, the tender grass, the birds; nature is beautiful and sin-
less, and we, only we, are sinful and foolish, and we don’t

The Brothers Karamazov