Page 21 - Megan Reichman

Women’s Work: Your Questions about Life
By Shelli Chosak Phd

congenial. In fact, your “former peers” will
respect you for it. One of the first steps to
take is to sit down with your team and tell
them while you have a new position, you
expect to continue working with them as a
team—without being contrite! Your tone of
voice and body language will be an important
way of communicating. You need to be clear
with yourself about your new position and the
responsibilities it entails. You also need to
recognize everyone will benefit from the new
boundaries you need to set.

This means being authoritative and good-
natured. An effective leader enlists the input
of her reports, acknowledging and utilizing
their skills whenever she can. Goal set-
ting for example, can be a group process.
Delegating regularly is also valuable for both
you and your team: It can save you time and
empower those you give responsibility to.

There will likely be some envy or resentment
from one or more of your former peers which
can take several forms, usually indirect. One San Diego
common way of expressing this is by the Woman
other person finding fault with what you do or
trying to show you they are better or smarter.
Recognize this for what it is and don’t take 21
it personally. Acknowledging their abilities
helps, as well as finding something you can
agree with, even if it’s minor, will help defuse
the tension. Do not apologize if they do
catch you in an error. You can say, “That’s
a good point,” or, “I’m glad you caught that.”
This provides acknowledgement without giv-
ing away your position of authority.

Setting limits on the kinds and amount of
socializing you do is important. Your team
needs to see you as someone who is no
Q: I have just been promoted to a managerial position longer “just one of the girls.” You can share
and feel awkward about having to give instructions and personal information on a “need to know” basis, without
discipline to my former peers. I find myself socializing providing all the intricate details or participating in any gos-
too much and not being able to take a leadership role. sip. It’s okay to go out to lunch with your team, just not on a
regular basis. You will need to decide how much you value
A: These are tricky waters to navigate. On the one hand, your new responsibilities and to what extent you are willing
you have been given new responsibilities and I’m sure you to modify your social relationships at work for the sake of
want to do a good job. On the other hand you’ve built a succeeding in your new job.
collegial relationship with your co-workers that you want to
preserve. How do you demonstrate your managerial skills Just remember, you are still the same person you were be-
without offending or alienating the good will? It is possible fore you were promoted, and you can be a valuable asset
to set and maintain appropriate boundaries and still be to your organization by maintaining the respect and good
will of your peers while managing the transition effectively.
September/October 2010