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that marvellous feeling carries a powerful promise of being too strong and too totally absorbing not to be long-lasting. We are convinced and most of us are
easily persuaded that love is spontaneous, it grows and maintains itself without us having to do anything much but give in to it!

But now we know that our love exists in and between us. It can be scary. It makes it clear that both need to be careful of each other and develop new skills
designed to protect the love and help it grow; it is anything but spontaneous. Many positive actions may be impulsive, but they are not without thought.

Your Relationship as a Sanctuary

For many people, when problems develop in life, their relationship becomes an additional strain or drain instead of what it should be, the one
place where you can go in the world to feel safe, comforted and supported. You may not always be able to use your relationship this way,
sometimes you will need to find relief and answers from within yourself, in your own heart. Your relationship should be there for you as a
beacon of strength and comfort.

All too often though, instead of being with your partner, connecting with him to replenish your energy, we avoid them, fearing that being together will sap
what remaining energy you have left. At its worst, the relationship can become the source of your pain and heartache, if you both let that happen, which only
adds to your desire to escape.

If you are with the wrong person, he or she still has unresolved issues they can’t put to one side, you may need to withdraw into yourself to regain your strength
to either confront the situation or find the courage to leave. All relationships go through their times of emotional tension or turmoil. However, it should not feel
like this all or most of the time.

Every relationship is different, and only you will know the truth about yours. Your heart will know if your partner is capable of providing you with
the ongoing emotional support you need and that they will keep up with your rate of emotional and spiritual growth. If you find yourself trusting other
people with your innermost fears, pains and secrets, then you must question the truth about the long-term future of your relationship.

The time to make assessments is not when everything in the garden is rosy, but when life throws its low ball at you. You deserve to feel that your
partner can be your emotional sanctuary, no matter what circumstances present themselves. You deserve the knowledge that no matter what happens
today or in the future, their arms around you will always make you feel that everything will be alright. If the feeling of comfort feels temporary, and
you know in your heart that it will be totally up to you to resolve a life problem, then they are not a true sanctuary. A sanctuary is a genuine place of
refuge or safety that helps you to feel genuinely safe. True sanctuary can only be provided by someone who knows enough about you and the problem
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and potential solutions, to provide real comfort and support, not mere “there, there” platitudes.