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Secondly, in believing there is only “one” the natural course of thinking would be to dismiss someone because they don’t fulfil every element of our “fantasy”
and we undervalue their unique qualities.

When a relationship ends, a common mistake is to choose a new partner who seems to have none of the flaws of the last, convincing ourselves that this is the “one”
because they don’t have those imperfections. Again, this involves selecting and committing before adequately satisfying ourselves they are compatible in key areas.

FACT : It is perfectly possible to experience true love and happiness with more than one person, in fact with many people. The human heart has a phenomenal capacity
for love, and we only limit ourselves to the quality and quantity of love we can attain because of erroneous belief in misconceptions about love.

FACT : Finding a partner with whom you are fully compatible, as well as one you love, is the secret for a healthy relationship that can last.

True love will meet my every need

“I want you to fulfil my every need, physical, emotional, spiritual and mental. I expect you will know what I want and expect without me having to tell you.
Whenever I am feeling insecure, sad or confused, I expect you to lift me, cheer me up and have all the answers. On top of all that, you will help me love
myself more when I need it, entertain me and share all my interests. You will be my perfect companion”

Outrageous isn’t it? Well, that’s what you are believing if you think that one true love can satisfy your every need.

And the sad truth is that many relationships are marred by one or both partners feeling disappointment with the other, after unconsciously expecting them to
deliver on their unrealistic expectations. By unconscious, I mean that you may not even have verbalised your needs to yourself let alone to your partner, and
yet resentment builds when they are not satisfied.

Belief in this particular piece of fiction sets your partner up to fail, to disappoint you before they have even been given a chance.

FACT: Many of our needs cannot and should not be fulfilled by our partner. We all need the variety of other people and indeed the strength of our own
resources to meet some of our needs.

FACT: An otherwise good relationship may falter because you may resent your partner for failing to fulfil a need you should be fulfilling yourself or with the
help of others.

FACT: If you feel emotionally empty in a part of your relationship, it may not be the responsibility, or within the ability of your partner to fulfil that emptiness. Page387
A partner may fulfil some of your needs, but never all of them.