Page 7 - October 2022
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is always a phenomenon of relationships,  phenomenon is what we are experiencing
            which requires two people in so far as             all the time, and it is especially important
            the person fascinated necessarily has              that we understand what is happening

            a corresponding disposition. But the               when it comes to the mating experience.
           disposition must be unconscious or no

        fascination will take place. The fascination  When we get to about forty, we
         is a compulsive phenomenon in the sense  realize that this same kind of person
          that it lacks a conscious motive; it is not          keeps magically appearing as if it is a

         a process of will, but something that rises  coincidence. It is not. As we mature
            up from the unconscious and forcibly               and gain insight into our behavior,

          obtrudes itself upon the conscious mind.             we come to the realization that this
        —Carl Jung, Two Essays in Analytical                   pattern has happened before. What we
        Psychology, paragraph 136                              always experience is our own energy

                                                               through the other.  If we are doing
        Just as with the shadow,                      We can be                 introspective work to

        this fascination can also be              simultaneously                become conscious, which
        experienced as repulsion.                                               is the goal of what Carl
        We can be simultaneously                   attracted and                Jung called ‘individuation,’
        attracted and repulsed by  repulsed by the very                         we begin to ask questions.

        the very same person if                     same person                 What is this about? Why

        they say or do something                                                is this repeating? When I
        we don’t like. Our partners can annoy                  first learned about this information, I
        us, and it’s usually out of proportion                 thought to myself, “this is so valuable

        to what they actually did, because they  and enlightening, everyone should
        are carrying a projected shadow part                   know it.”

        of us. Notice also, that in the movies
        like The Titanic and Romeo and Juliet,  When we’re falling in love, we’re actually
        a death occurs. This too, is symbolic,                 putting part of our soul (our own inner

        as we have to go through the death or                  beloved) on that person. They can carry
        removal of our projections.                            it for us for a time, but if anybody has

                                                               been married before, or in and out of
        Most of us have heard the term                         relationships, we know that eventually
        projection by now, but what people do                  the projections onto our beloved are

        not realize is that we are not the ones                going to fall off. We will no longer be
        who is projecting. It is not something                 able to believe that this is a magical and

        that we do of our own volition. It is our              perfect being as their shadow and our
        unconscious that projects itself out onto              shadow will become glaringly obvious to
        the other person. This psychological                   both of us.

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