Page 15 - Layout 1

Kings College Following 22.06.2021_Layout 1 24/08/2021 14:16 Page 15

Grief in children and young people

The level of understanding of the meaning of death and individual
responses will vary according to the age of each child. Even very
young children will have some awareness of the death and feel
sadness and distress which they may not be able to express openly
or easily.

It is very important to communicate openly with children about illness
and death, so that they can process their loss and express their
feelings. It is common for them to have false beliefs about being
responsible in some way for the death, so it is important that they
understand why their special person died. Children grieve very
differently to adults. Often they may appear unaffected by the death,
and will go about their normal routine and not talk much about the
deceased. This is not an indication that they don’t care, just a normal
way that children cope with loss. Over time, they may ask questions,
and may need to hear the same information over and over again to
understand it fully. They may be angrier or more withdrawn, and have
nightmares or problems sleeping. You may notice that they act
younger than their years for a while following the loss. All these things
are normal grief reactions. Things that help are letting children know
what will stay the same, keeping to normal routines, providing extra
love and reassurance and informing the child’s school so they can
support them too.

Further help

Asking for help outside the family can often be difficult but may be a
great benefit to you. Support is available from the Palliative Care Team
at King’s College Hospital and from other sources, some of which are
listed in Useful contacts on page 19 of this booklet.

The Palliative Care Team
Telephone: 020 3299 4060
Email: kch-tr.palliativecareteam@nhs.net

14