Page 57 - ALIVE CODE

DARE TO BE A.L.I.V.E. - DON’T BE A D.A.S.H.

Begin Disputing and replacing the “I can’t stand it” statements with more
self-helping philosophies. Thus, you can say, “I really don’t like this hassle but
I can stand it.” “I hate writing this paper but I’ll nish it soon.” “It’s
uncomfortable but it won’t kill me.”

The truth is that you can stand practically any dif culty unless, of course, it
kills you. If it kills you, then you won’t be very happy at all, but you rarely will
die from a hassle, and you can almost always make yourself happy in some
ways in spite of it.

One way to increase your frustration tolerance is to talk or think differently
about your situation and how you react to it. You can tell yourself something
like this:

I really don’t like this because I feel frustrated and distinctly want things to be
different. But even though I don’t like it and feel very frustrated, I can stand it.
I don’t like to be uncomfortable, but it won’t shatter me. Being uncomfortable
is something that I often have to experience in order to get the thirds I=ant
and to make the changes I desire.

Think about your Activating Experience and your Goals. In order to reach
your Goals you will probably encounter some real frustration. Good things
rarely come easy. What are the dif cult things that you had better do in
order to reach your Goal?

In order to reach my Goal, I will do some dif cult and uncomfortable things,
including... (Example: Talking strangers to make more social contacts - Going
for more job interviews until I actually get a job.).

You identi ed some of the dif cult, frustrating, or uncomfortable things that
you are willing to do in order to reach your Goal. Now, identify the ways that
your life will be better if you reach your goal.

ALIVE CODE
Page 56