Page 55 - ALIVE CODE

DARE TO BE A.L.I.V.E. - DON’T BE A D.A.S.H.

No matter how bad an Activating Experience seems, you can still nd
happiness in your life, even if you never solve this particular problem. Of
course, you will be less happy if your Adversity persists. But, if you think
rationally, you won’t make yourself totally miserable.

You will be able to change disruptive actions, feelings and behaviors if you
begin anti- awfulizing.

Review what you wrote about the Activating Event. Identify some of your
awful - self-talk about this Activating Event.

I AWFULIZE about this unfortunate Activating Experience when I tell myself
(Example: It’s AWFUL that my boss doesn’t appreciate me as he/she must!).

Dispute your awfulizing self-talk and develop a more effective outlook.

I could make this Activating Experience less AWFUL by telling myself...
(Example: Why should my boss act differently just because I want this to
happen? No reason! That’s too bad that my boss doesn’t appreciate me, but I
can still enjoy my work and lead a good life.).

Work on getting your problem into a different perspective by anti-awfulizing.
Notice what you think and say to yourself to make your experience seem
awful Then practice Disputing and replacing these awfulizing statements
with less disruptive statements about your problem, such as: “It’s bad, but...”
“It’s painful, but...” “It’s a pain in the neck, but...” By doing this you begin to
put your situation into a more realistic perspective.

Low Frustration Tolerance (LFT)

One result of your unfortunate Activating Experience can be your feeling of
frustration with what is going on.

ALIVE CODE
Page 54