Page 188 - Reason To Sing by Kelita Haverland
P. 188

Reason To Sing




                              Chapter Thirty-Three

                            Good-Bye April




          The doctor’s office is white and sterile. I feel like I am going to
          be sick. The back of my neck is clammy and the pounding of
          my heavy heart reaches all the way up to my brain.
              My breasts are tender. And heavy. So much so, they feel like
          they don’t belong to me. And then there’s my period. The one I
          prayed would come. Only it didn’t.
              When my doctor walks into the room she doesn’t need to
          say anything. I already know. My body does not lie. My worst
          nightmare has come true. I am pregnant. I should be ready to
          have a child. I’m 31, a good age to start a family. But that’s not
          the problem. It is a nightmare because I know the baby does
          not belong to Hudson. He has a very low sperm count (he’s
          been tested). I’ve been off the pill for years now and we never
          use any protection. I am in deep, deep trouble.
              My mind is racing. Should I lead him to believe this baby is
          his? Should I leave him and go be with the true father? Should
          I run away, not be with either man or raise this child on my
          own? I am overwhelmed, but more than anything I am terrified
          of being found out by Hudson. I have visions of him wanting
          to kill me, knowing that I am carrying some other man’s seed.
              “Get back to me and let me know what you want to do,
          okay Kelita?  There will need to be a decision made soon.”
          The doctor can tell I’m upset. She knows the story. I can only
          imagine what she’s thinking about me. I feel like such a fool.
              “Yes, I will. Thanks for seeing me on such short notice.” I
          had held off making this appointment until I thought I might


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