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Sefer Chafetz Chayim
Hilchot Esurei Lashon Hara

Kelal Dalet - Halachah 1

Hagahah

Understand clearly that all this relates to an ordinary Jew, as I will explain
further on in the third rule of this Kelal. But if it becomes apparent that
the reason for his behavior was because he is an apostate, G‑d forbid,
then the Lav of (Vayikrah 19:16) “Do not peddle gossip in society” is not
applicable since he is not in the category of “your brother” \ “your fellow
Jew.” The details of the law that do apply to this kind of person will be
discussed further on in the 8th Kelal.

Be’er Mayim Chayim

(4/1/1)-(1)..repeating demeaning stories: This rule is taught by

Rabbeinu Yonah in Shaare Teshuvah (3rd sha’ar, at the end of section #214).
It appears that even if there was no intention to humiliate this person (the
“victim”) and even if in making those remarks to the listener the “victim”
would not be belittled in the esteem of the listener because (for example)
the speaker knows from past experience that the listener would not lessen
his esteem for this Ba’al Teshuvah because of what he had done earlier in
his life or because of what his fathers had done in the past, even so it is
forbidden to make the remarks because if they were made in the presence
of the Ba’al Teshuvah he most certainly would be hurt and offended by
them. This idea is found in Gemara Babba Metziah (59a) regarding David
HaMelech who said that even if his flesh was being torn apart, still he
would not bleed.11 Therefore it is forbidden to make this remark about
this person when he was not present, because if the content of the remark
became generally publicized it might have been cause for doing harm to
this person financially or at the very least to annoy him. The Rambam
addressed this subject (Hilchot De’Aut, 7th perek, 5th halacha) saying that
if this type of remark became common knowledge and could cause this
person to be hurt financially or physically or could cause him emotional
pain or cause him to become afraid, the remark is Lashon Hara.

The intent of the Rambam is that even if the speaker had no intention
to embarrass this person (the comment is forbidden). The Kesef Mishne
comments on this Ramban that his source is an incident described in Gemara
Shabbat (33b) involving Yehudah Ben Garim (as Rashi explained in the

11 Because he was so drained by the pain of his embarrassment at the hands of
his tormentors.

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