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Let me explain my view: If a person is sick with a serious illness, he #
is obligated to inform a potential wife for two reasons: The first is to
avoid violating a mitzvah between man and his fellow, and the second
is to avoid violating a mitzvah between man and G-d.
1. Between man and his fellow: It says in the Torah: “You shall not SHOULD ONE TELL
wrong your fellowman” (Vayikra 25:17). It is ruled in Kiryas Sefer 72 A GROOM ABOUT AN
(Ch. 18 of Hilchos Mechirah) that just as it is a Torah prohibition ATTEMPTED SUICIDE BY
to deceive someone when buying and selling, so too it is a Torah THE BRIDE IN HER YOUTH
prohibition to deceive someone in any other way. In light of this,
it is a Torah prohibition to deceive someone in matchmaking. If
the patient does not reveal his serious illness, he is deceiving his
fellowman and hurting him.
1
2. Between man and G-d: If a woman unknowingly marries a man Question Revealing a bRide's eaRlieR atteMpt at suicide
with a serious illness, the marriage is considered a mistaken I treated a twenty-year-old girl in her youth due to a mild learning
transaction. (This refers to the type of illness that would warrant disability. These problems straightened themselves out in the best 20818_efi-ab - 20818_park-C_efi-ab | 2 - A | 18-08-20 | 13:46:23 | SR:-- | Magenta #20818_efi-ab - 20818_park-C_efi-ab | 2 - A | 18-08-20 | 13:46:23 | SR:-
her asking for a divorce). So the man is living with this woman possible way. A few months ago, she attempted suicide by swallowing
without being properly married, and the blessings recited at the sleeping pills. The reason for her attempted suicide was various social
wedding and the seven days of celebration were all for naught. pressures and difficulties with her faith. She underwent neurological
All these are serious transgressions between man and G-d.
and psychiatric testing which revealed that she does not have a mental
In our case, if we do not reveal her illness to her, she will not violate illness, such as psychosis, but problems adapting to her own matu-
“Do not wrong your fellowman”, because she did not know about her ration. She expressed sincere regret for her actions and is receiving
illness and she married him in innocence. On the other hand, she intense psychological treatment.
would be violating the second prohibition: living with her husband The questions are:
without a proper marriage. Since the physician could have prevented 1. When a match is suggested, is she obligated to reveal this single
this but did not do so, he is guilty. As explained in Tosfos (Shevuos 30b, episode, assuming that there is no evidence of mental illness
s.v. aval), “We can also say that if one transgresses a violation through and it is therefore highly unlikely that the episode will repeat
a witness (who did not protest the transgression in the beis din), it itself, and in light of the fact that this was a one-time episode,
is not viewed as if the witness sinned passively (shev v’al taaseh), but and there is no presumption of this happening to her again?
rather that he actively transgressed (kum v’aseh).”
2. If the answer to question one is that she need not reveal her past,
It’s also possible that by withholding the information the physi-
cian would violate “Do not wrong your fellowman.” As explained in is there a set time that she must wait before looking for a mate,
answer to the previous question, the Ibn Ezra says that the Torah in order to strengthen the presumption that she is healthy?
wrote “Do not wrong your fellowman” in the plural form, to include 3. Again, assuming that the answer to question one is that she
witnesses. It’s possible that the agent of the wrongdoing and all those need not reveal her past, what would be the halacha in a similar
42 1 Medical-HalacHic Responsa of Rav ZilbeRstein Revealing a bride's earlier attempt at suicide 2 27
