Page 12 - flip book- How To Survive Baby Loss

How To Survive Baby Loss

or holistic caregiver who can find any underlying issues which
could cause a problem. The proper knowledge will help you to
identify contaminants in your environment and avoid contam-
ination in your body. You do not have to wait until three losses
in a row before you seek information, like I did.

Be wise and do your own research. Get the tests and rule out
what you can, but one thing that you will find in the tragic situ-
ation of baby loss, is the unexpected intensity of the feelings of
self-blame you will feel. People can tell you all day long that it is
not your fault, but you have to be the one to believe it. For your
mental health, you cannot look for a cause under every rock. I
know that for many of us, not blaming ourselves is inconceiv-
able, but you mustn’t do it. I know, because I have been there
myself, and it is still something that I battle.

We burst with regret. “Was it something I ate? Was it the
medicine I took that I didn’t consult the doctor about? Did I ex-
ercise too much? Did I exercise too little? The doctor told me to
walk and lower my stress. I was too busy and too tired to follow
his recommendations. Was it that natural cleansing supplement
I thought would be safe? Did I eat too much junk food, even
though I knew I should stop, knowing my blood pressure was
too high? Is there something wrong with my body, and I never
should have gotten pregnant in the first place? Should I have
paid more attention to the kicks? I should have had more fruits
and vegetables. Why didn’t I?” It is so difficult, because deep
down you believe you could have done something different.
Sometimes, other people make remarks that make us feel it’s
our fault.
Dear friend. Stop right there. Repeat, “It’s not my fault.” It
may be a process to let go, and if this is you, that is perfect-
ly okay. Let me present this statement: you would have saved
your baby or babies if you could have. You would have a thou-
sand times over. You would have done anything to save them.
Your love for your child is incredible. You may have prayed
your child would make it, even in the case where your own life
was in jeopardy due to complications. The depth of a mother
and father’s love is infinite.

12