Page 153 - The Circle of Life

and that is what I mean. Even if you steel yourself against it when it happens it

is a shock.

I know from talking to my clients that many feel very guilty for it happens that

the deceased suffered so much that they wished him dead. Anyone reading here
who saw a parent or wife dying of cancer will understand what I mean. I wish to

tell you that it is OK. It is an act of love to switch the machines off in
jurisdictions which allows passive assistance. In law the fancy word is euthanasia

and in most countries the passive form, where you switch the machines off, is
legal. At the same time active euthanasia where you inject the patient with an

overdose to kill him would be murder in many countries. This is a cause for
tremendous debate amongst lawyers and medical men.

Please talk to your wife about your wishes if in a coma and you simply have no

reasonable medical chance of recovering. The doctors will ask her for it is her
rights as a spouse as we saw to give permission to make an end. You will not

believe what anguish your failure to discuss this beforehand cause to the one
making such a decision. This must be included in your will and is called a "living

will" in law. For me the answer is simple. Pull the plug.

At the same time talk to your wife about your feelings to donate your organs. I

know this sounds gruesome but it is not. Once departed your body is nothing but
rotting flesh if I may be so cruel and you certainly have no need for it but others

may. Donate if you feel it is right but don't if not. The point is to decide and

make your decision known. All this should also be in your will.

Ensure your affairs are in order

Many spouses have absolutely no idea what happens in the others financial life
and thus would not know what policies and insurance you have or where you

keep copies of it. We once had to blow open a safe (not as easy as you think)
because the deceased had the combination and of course died with it. It is not

funny even though the police bomb squad was grateful for the practise and so

was I.

Keep a box where you put all your bank details, investments, will, insurance and

whatever else is of interest like assets and debts and make sure your wife knows

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