Page 118 - E-BOOK SEJARAH DAN BUDAYA INDONESIA

When the appointed day arrives, the male family sends a proposal group which usually
consists of 5 people. Namely 1 chairman (male) and 4 members (2 men and 2 women). The person
chosen to be the head of the proposal group is a person who is wise and polite in speaking and can
play rhymes or jokes. If there is no such person in his family, then he can ask someone else (outside
his relative) who is used to doing it for help. Meanwhile, the 4 members usually consist of 2
relatives and 2 neighbors.

4. Deliver Signs

If the proposal is welcomed by the woman's family (approved), then the next step is to take
the tande. This activity is carried out on the 4th or 5th day of the proposal. As a preparation, 2 or
3 days in advance, the family of the man will invite relatives, neighbors and closest friends to
participate in the event. The event to escort this tande is usually led by the person who is in the
proposal to be the head of the group.

The person was chosen because he was judged to have the right requirements, namely being
good at rhyming, having a great sense of humor, wide social circle, and knowing exactly about
marriage customs. In this case the person is also a representative of the male family. The equipment
that needs to be prepared in this activity are: (1) betel nut, (2) potpourri, (3) rings, and (4)
accompaniment items. Tepak sirih contains: a betel nut that has been peeled off, whiting and
gambier, tobacco, betel leaf, and kacip.

5. Deliver Shopping

Delivering shopping (delivery of wedding party needs) in this stage the man returns to the
girl's family home. Dal between shopping for wedding party needs is usually determined at the
request of the woman's family. A sum of money that was shaped in such a way was brought along
with his accompaniment such as a set of clothes and objects that the girl liked.

6. Inviting and Picking Up

The invite and pick up event is part of the preparations made to carry out the work in the
marriage-marriage assembly. The implementation in this work contains the values of togetherness
among each other. Before the invite and pick up event is held, first a deliberation is held at the
bride's house to determine who will be invited and picked up.

This pick-up job should be done carefully so that the people who deserve to be invited are
not wrong. Because this case also concerns the respect and position of a person in society. So it
appears that the work of inviting and picking up has high ethical and moral values. To invite and
pick up this is done by several married couples who already have experience. And always carry a
betel leaf complete with its contents.

7. Hanging

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