Page 91 - The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts

you straight. It is to understand you.

LEARNING TO TALK

Quality conversation requires not only sympathetic
listening but also self-revelation. When a wife says, “I wish
my husband would talk. I never know what he’s thinking or
feeling,” she is pleading for intimacy. She wants to feel
close to her husband, but how can she feel close to
someone whom she doesn’t know? In order for her to feel
loved, he must learn to reveal himself. If her primary love
language is quality time and her dialect is quality
conversation, her emotional love tank will never be filled
until he tells her his thoughts and feelings.

If you need to learn the language of quality conversation,
begin by noting the emotions you feel away from home.

Self-revelation does not come easy for some of us.
Many adults grew up in homes where the expression of
thoughts and feelings was not encouraged but condemned.
To request a toy was to receive a lecture on the sad state
of family finances. The child went away feeling guilty for
having the desire, and he quickly learned not to express his
desires. When he expressed anger, the parents responded
with harsh and condemning words. Thus, the child learned