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Source: allprodad.com
we’re patient, we put them at ease and open up the lines of com-
“Dad, can I tell you something?” How did the last difficult conver- munication
sation go with your kid? Hard conversations with kids can be ex-
tremely tricky. But did you know you can make or break your con- When our kids ask to tell us something, our first response should
versations with kids in the first 10 seconds of them? be, “Always!” Then, when our kids begin to tell us what’s on
their minds, we should use responses like, “Tell me more!” or
We give our kids a “first impression” every time they come to us “I’m glad you told me that. Thank you for sharing that with
with a difficult question, problem, or failure. As dads, we have a me.” Give your kids confidence in those first 10 seconds so they
great opportunity to convey patience, love, and understanding in can communicate clearly and openly and you can understand
our conversations with kids. Here are 3 reasons the first 10 sec- their entire situation.
onds of any conversation with your kids are the most important:

1. The first 10 seconds communi-
cate whether you are for or against 3. The first 10 seconds determine
them. whether future conversations hap-
pen.
Your reaction in the first 10 sec-
onds of a conversation tells your “We should do everything we can
son or daughter whether you are a to get our kids to run to us instead
safe person to talk to. As dads, we of away when they need help.”
must realize our kids may have I’m very confident the vast majori-
taken days to weeks mustering up ty of us want our kids running to
the courage to talk to us. No mat- us when they have problems or
ter what your kids may say, thank mess up. We want them to believe
them for trusting you enough to we’re going to support and help
share it. You can even encourage them through whatever situation
them by saying, “That must have or circumstances they find them-
taken courage to tell me. I’m proud selves in. If in these first 10 sec-
of you.” onds they have a poor experience
When our kids hear these state- or we convey we’re angry with
ments, it nurtures trust. It’s human them or don’t have the time for
nature not to want to disappoint them, they may eventually think to
or anger someone. If, however, our themselves, “Yeah, Dad’s not for
kids find that we’re patient and me. I better get help somewhere
understanding when that happens, else.” Or worse, they’ll think they
we communicate this: “You’re not can’t get help at all.
a problem, I want to understand
your situation, and I want to help
you.” But when we remain calm and
express our love for our kids no
2. The first 10 seconds can set the matter what they tell us, they learn
conversation up for success. we’re always there for them and
Think about it: Have you ever been intimidated to talk to someone want them to talk to us. As dads, we should do everything we can
and worried about what he or she will think? Meeting our kids to get our kids to run to us instead of away when they need help.
with patience, love, and a desire to understand in those first 10 Conversations with our kids will be difficult from time to time,
seconds gives them confidence and allows them to speak freely. but we can instill trust and confidence and foster better commu-
Many times, our kids will “test” us by only sharing what they nication with how we spend the first 10 seconds.
think we want to hear or what won’t sound so bad. However, when

82 “ኢትዮጵያ ለዘላለም ትኑር ” ድንቅ መጽሔት - የካቲት 2013