Page 27 - flip book- How To Survive Baby Loss

Triggers Here,Triggers There, Triggers Everywhere

Grieve your way as long as it is not self-destructive or harm-
ful to others. Watch out for any unhealthy patterns such as fast-
ing or binge eating days on end, drinking, smoking, destroying
property, and self-harming thoughts. Some have struggled with
an unhealthy history of behaviors before child loss, so be mind-
ful of what it could bring up for you. In our attempt to control
outcomes or cope with feelings, we turn towards self-hatred or
unhealthy coping such as superficial cutting or burning as an
expression of pain. This is not loving or helpful in the long haul.

Another aspect that you may find yourself struggling with is
fleeting, vague suicidal thoughts of wanting to end your life, or
at the very least, wishing “you were not here.” You may experi-
ence overwhelming thoughts of wanting to be with your baby
and this is understandable. It is not talked about often, but if you
have depression or anxiety that is affecting your ability to func-
tion, then consider the guidance of a professional who can help
you explore and heal. Furthermore, seek help for destructive
mental health issues such as being suicidal or homicidal with
plans, means, or intent to kill self or others. Tell someone you
trust, and build professional help with ongoing counseling or
hospitalization if you cannot be safe. Explore your options to
seek holistic or psychiatric, pastoral or professional counseling
from a private insurance provider by contacting your insurance
and requesting a list of counselors and psychiatrists.

Another option to find a counselor who takes your insur-
ance is searching the counselor profiles and specialties on psy-
chologytoday.com. There are mental health services often free
through AHCCCS or state insurance, depending on your loca-
tion and services available in your area. Some churches or agen-
cies can provide counseling for a sliding scale fee based on your
income. If you are employed, consider contacting your human
resources department (HR) for free counseling. Often employ-
ers offer up to six to ten free sessions per year. If you continue to
need counseling or you need more specific counseling, they can
refer you to another provider. Be honest with yourself and them
about what you are needing, because they are there to help you.

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