Page 38 - Meeting with Children Manual
P. 38

Section 4                                                                      P a ge  | 36









                   PHASE TWO: THE CHILD MEETINGS




                   What is happening in this section
                         A Two Meeting Approach

                         Selection of Activities for Child Meeting
                         Child and Youth Readiness Scale

                         Child and Youth Concerns Scale



                   OVERVIEW FOR MEETING WITH CHILDREN



                   PREPARING FOR MEETING WITH CHILDREN


                   We recommend that the child consultant meet one time with each parent prior to
                   meeting the child(ren). This provides the Consultant with some context re: what they
                   observe and hear from the child. Each parent can provide their concerns and let the
                   Consultant know what the child(ren) are interested in and a little about the child’s
                   temperament, personality style, strengths and challenges. During the individual
                   meeting with each parent the child consultant can go over a Consent Form that should
                   clearly outline the scope and limitations of the role of the child consultant. Who will
                   pay for the meetings and how will payment be made should be established in advance
                   to avoid arguments over payment (could be part of your child consultant Agreement).

                   Confidentiality
                   The issue of Confidentiality must be discussed with the parents in advance of seeing
                   the children. Children will have input as to what they would like the child consultant
                   to tell their parents (risk and disclosures of abuse are obvious exceptions). The parents
                   should be introduced the language of “private but not secret”. Before meeting with a
                   child, you will go over what you will tell the children about confidentiality with the
                   parents. Parents are then prepared when you tell their child about privacy vs. secrecy
                   at the very beginning of their first meeting. You will ensure that the parents know not
                   to ask their children questions about their time with you and to allow children to say
                   what they would like to say (if anything) to their parents after your meetings.

                   Purpose of Meeting
                   Let the parents know you will be looking for how their children are doing (going), how
                   they view their family now that they  have two houses, and what are  their  main
                   concerns? Concerns can include such things as relationships in family, concerns about
                   peers or school, concerns about pets or extracurricular activities. Introduce the parent
                   to the language of concerns so that when they get feedback they are already working


     © The International Centre for Children and Family Law Inc.  This material cannot be copied in whole or in part without the express written permission
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