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We know that we are important simply for being here. We believe we have a right to express ourselves, and to be happy. We are certain that we have a purpose
for living. We can have dignity and poise, regardless of our physical appearance, financial status, possessions, occupation, accomplishments and things that
we cannot control such as other people's opinions of us.

Self-esteem is the collection of thoughts, images, beliefs, and physical habits that correspond to our perception and opinion of ourselves. Self-esteem manifests
itself in our outer world. We know that we possess unique talents and perspectives that make an important contribution to society. We have the right and
responsibility to develop that potential.

While we created our ideas about ourselves, we were particularly vulnerable to other people's teasing, insults, rejections, and shaming. As adults, we are less
vulnerable to the same assaults if we have learned that we are responsible for our own self esteem. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, "No one can make you feel
inferior without your consent". It is difficult to have self-esteem without support from people, at least from the people whom we respect.

If we value honesty, and we violate that value, we can be damaging our self-esteem, if we respond excessively or incorrectly. When we correct the action, our
self-esteem is restored and even enhanced because we have indicated to ourselves that we are competent to live life fairly and directly. We can question the
values that were violated. We realize that our values are ineffective for the purpose of enhancing our life, so we change them. We can avoid shaming ourselves
and becoming wracked with guilt. Shame and guilt are harmful and unnecessary acts in which we proclaim that we are flawed and incapable. In one sense,
shame and guilt are the opposite of self-esteem. They damage self-esteem.

Low self–esteem is at the core of our behaviours which make us feel that life is unproductive or unmanageable. The purpose of this chapter is to assist you to
get life under control so as to feel more productive, successful and happy.

The development of low self-esteem takes time. It takes a series of events and a chain of habitual behaviours to dampen our sense of self-worth. What is most
important is for you to identify the negative impact of low self esteem which has resulted in your feelings of being out of control, unproductive, and unhappy.

Low self–esteem has its origins in a number of life circumstances. If you come from a family of origin where one or both of your parents had problems with:
alcohol, drugs, mental illness, inability to show warmth, affection and approval, overly critical, rigid in religious belief, workaholism, then in all likelihood
your self–esteem suffered. If you were physically, emotionally, verbally, or sexually abused or neglected your self–esteem was lowered.

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