Page 20 - HaMizrachi #8 Pesach

Rabbanit Rachelle Fraenkel

Family Night

nnual polls indicate that over On the other hand, some would say that the classic Jewish model. There is room
95% of the Israeli public bringing a child into this world is almost for sensitivity to others whose lifestyle
A celebrate Seder night in one an act of cruelty, an egotistical option differs from mine. However, my call
form or another. And given that only for parental self-realization. In contrast, here is not to give up on the aspiration,
51% define themselves as religious or the ethos of the Jewish family is that on the great vision of family. Not to let
traditional, this figure is astonishing. one who believes, sows. Jewish parents go of the understanding that family is a
begin a family with faith in goodness, treasure and a destiny, the well-planted,
Why is this? with dreams of building a house in
which both human beings and the well-watered root from which everything
Well, beyond the many virtues of Pesach, grows.
it would appear that one advantage or Divine Presence can dwell in harmony.
attraction stands out above the rest: On a deeper level, we realize that upon True, building a family requires effort,
Seder night is the night of family. starting a family we are entering into a emotional investment, time, delaying
partnership with G-d to make the world gratification, concessions, and a clear set
Judaism did not introduce the concept a better place. of priorities (because no one on their
of family into the world, but family deathbed ever regretted not spending
means the world to Judaism. Beyond any particular halacha or
custom, there is a clear Jewish voice more time in the office).
There seems to be no better incubator directed at both men and women: These are choices that require patience
for human cubs. No better glasshouse develop the world, learn Torah, be for deep, complex processes instead of
for nurturing individuals, and no creative and innovative and benevolent, click-quick addictions to excitement,
better building block for constructing a and yet when all is told, your family is
cooperative and just society. probably the most important thing you’ll and trust in our ability, together, to form
ever create. a stable, healthy and long-term entity
I would even go further and suggest that is greater than the sum of its parts
that our ability to repair the world, to That said, what is happening all around (each of which is invaluable).
live with a sense of responsibility to us today? Much has been proclaimed
others, and to implement most of the about traditional family structures and The Torah requires each family to
great ambitions of the individual, the values crumbling in the modern world. eat the Korban Pesach together in one
community, and the nation, all stem Individualism, pluralism, and the variety house. This is meant to elevate the
from our family roots. of new ‘family’ configurations, plus home and to emphasize the centrality
growing divorce rates, dwindling birth of the home and the family in the life of
Judaism is undeniably family centric. rates, children born out of wedlock, and the individual. Nowadays, Seder night,
From our Matriarchs and Patriarchs more are all cited as causes. The cute the night of “and you shall tell your
down through the generations; from and familiar drawing of a child depicting children,” unites all the members of the
individuals, to families, to a nation of his or her family as a robust and stable household around one table. This is the
families, the Jewish family has been unit – father-mother-children – is fast
the main font of strength, education, becoming an exception in many places. night we are reminded of our shared past
continuity and character for millennia. and mutual destiny. This is the night the
But let us take a step back for a moment. Jewish nation was born, family by family.
The family is also the main arena for When writing about the family as the
religious life, with parental obligations, basis of all, I fear I might hurt those
yet with a most grateful commitment to who did not grow up in a supportive
honoring parents. Parents are obligated family, or those longing to establish
to invest in their children’s education, a family who have not yet fulfilled
and to share regular yet special family their dream. I am afraid to upset those
time around the Shabbat table, holidays whose circumstances led them to Rabbanit Rachelle Fraenkel teaches
and particularly Seder night itself. establish family units that differ from Torah at midrashot in Israel

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