Page 76 - Family Life Student Textbook

1 Corinthians 7:3–5 “The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the
wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it
to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own
body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual
consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come
together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

This passage teaches that a husband owes his wife these kinds of loving complements and sexual fulfillment.
And she owes him the same. We are not to deprive our mate of this important part of married life.

Sex is an intimate communication involving the body, soul and spirit.

1) Sexual intimacy is affected by our Spiritual Life.

Because sex is so much more than just a physical interaction, our spiritual life will affect the quality of our
sexual relationship in marriage. If a husband and wife are not unified spiritually, this will have a negative
effect on their sexual relationship. Selfishness is one of the biggest problems in the area of the sexual
relationship. God created sex with the intent that we give 100% to our mate. And this is a very special gift
that needs to be reserved for our mates only.

But selfishness tempts us to view sex as a way to get our own needs fulfilled rather than giving to our mate.
Remember the shame Adam and Eve felt after the fall. If we view sex as a way to get what we want while
giving the least, it will cause bitterness and resentment. And if we selfishly take all that we can get our mate
will feel used.

Regular confession and repentance, both to God and to our mate, will go a long way in helping us have an
enjoyable sexual relationship.

2) Sex is affected by our Soul (mind, emotions and will).

The Bible uses the word “soul” to describe our mind, emotions, and will. The soul is the real person which
separates from the body at physical death and goes into eternity. Sex is affected by our soul and who we
really are inside. Sex is not just a physical act. It involves two people as whole beings.

Incorrect information we believe limits our sexual fulfillment. This incorrect information is programed into
our mind by our parents, peer pressure, entertainment, advertising, pornography, and so on. Our emotions
react to this incorrect information. And our will makes decisions based upon this incorrect information.

It comes naturally for us to believe our mate has the same understanding, emotions, and decision-making
tendencies as we have. However, God created the man and the woman to be unique individuals and to see
issues relating to sex differently. He did this on purpose, so that our marriage would be more balanced and
so we could fulfill one another. Contrast these differences in the chart below.

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