Page 161 - Advanced Biblical Counseling Student Textbook

11. How can you repair any damage to yourself and your views in this area?

You may have to spend some time here helping them resolve some damage which has occurred in their
sexual relationship. They may have some warped ideas about sex in marriage. Feel free to openly talk
about it to the couple and help them learn about their “love talk.”

Children in the future
Talk to them about building a godly heritage in their children. Ask them these questions:

1. How do you want to mold your children? Describe the characteristics you want them to have as
young adults.
2. How would you go about teaching them these characteristics?
3. What do you want to change about how your parents molded you?
4. Describe the general qualities you desire in a mate in order to help you build a godly heritage.
5. How many children do you want to have?
6. Should a couple wait until they can “afford” children?
7. How close in age should the children be?
8. What if you have all girls – or all boys?
9. What if you have no children at all?
10. What attitude would you take toward an abnormal child?
11. Should both parents work after children come?
12. How should your children be disciplined?
13. Who is responsible for the discipline?
14. Should the wife wait until the father comes home so he can discipline on certain issues?
15. For what kinds of things should the wife be required to discipline the children?
16. What form of punishment would you use?
17. What form of positive reinforcement would you use to encourage your child? How and why do
parents show partiality to a child?
18. How might your children share responsibility in the family?
19. What place should pets have in your home?
20. How much should you sacrifice for your children?
21. How can you teach spiritual truths to young children?
22. How often should parents leave children with babysitters?
23. How are you going to keep your children safe and teach them to keep themselves safe from
harmful people?

Finances in marriage.
Probably the leading cause of divorce stems from the area of finances. Either there is not enough
money to support the family, or decisions about how to spend money is in conflict. As them the
following questions:

1. What is your current or anticipated income?
2. What debts does each of you have?
3. What are your assets?
4. What finances will be required for future educational plans?
5. What are your plans for giving?
6. What are your plans for saving money?

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