Page 333 - Reason To Sing by Kelita Haverland

Epilogue

Daddy: For years after my father’s brutal suicide, I struggled
to understand the depths of inner turmoil that compelled
him to end his life so violently. We all knew he was prone
to depression, but no one suspected it would lead to such an
agonizing conclusion. Many years ago, long after my mother
died, I finally asked my stepfather, “Why?” He had known my
father as a colleague and even friend and my slimmest hope
was that he might possess some information which would
clarify things for me.
Indeed, he did.
With no fanfare whatsoever, Mike informed me that my
mother had discovered my father and another farmer, who was
a very close friend of the family, in a homosexual relationship.
Wow.
Was I shocked? Of course. But was I totally surprised? We
all knew this man. He was part of our lives and had been part
of my father’s life since they were both young men. The two
of them went hunting together, assisted each other on their
farms and shared in family gatherings. He never married so
he became our favourite uncle who wasn’t an uncle. So many
times, Daddy, with Vian and me in tow, would drop in for a
visit. It all made sense.
It also occurred to me that we never heard anything about
Daddy’s involvement with other women, prior to life with my
mother. There were no old photographs or stories about past
relationships. Was that normal?
Turns out that on that fateful day, Friday October 17th, my

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