Page 20 - Relationships101 A Guide To Building Healthy Relationships Final 1
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2. Reaction is aggressive, response is calm
Imagine a situation when you are arguing with your colleague and he abuses you. You are most likely
going to experience an impulse to hurl back an abuse. But ask yourself, would that be the right thing to
do? Your unconscious mind may fuel your anger through pre-judged notions. However, once you sit
back and evaluate, you get a chance to step into the other person’s shoes and understand their actions.
This gives you an opportunity to respond more accurately.
3. Reaction fuels disagreement, response helps resolve it
The instant reaction that we give can lead to a lot of discomfort in a relationship. Since it is usually
based on assumptions, you will find it difficult to justify your actions in this phase. The response, on the
other hand, is more likely to help you resolve a conflict.
4. Reaction weakens you, but response empowers you
The minute you start taking into consideration the well-being of everyone around, there is a higher
possibility of making empowered decisions. Needless to say, these decisions are beneficial in the
professional as well as personal life. On the other hand, the reaction can usher the consequences that you
are likely to regret later.
How not to react
From the minute we step out of bed in the morning, each one of us has to choose between reaction and
response. More often than not, a lot of us end up reacting because we do not have the time to respond!
Before the mind learns how to respond, it is important to learn how not to react. So, here are a few tips
on how not to react:
1. Do not react aggressively
Even if you are right, the other person need not always be wrong. When you react aggressively, it spells
bad news for you as well as the person on the other side. For starters, you are accumulating negativity by
choosing to react aggressively. This is usually a no-filter reaction so the person on the receiving end will
not see any value in the conversation.
2. Do not react without thinking about the other person
One should always take into consideration the feelings of the other person while reacting. How will your
reaction impact the other person? The answer to this question actually ends up deciding the future of
your conversation.
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